She Will Be Loved, Sequel to Time Will Tell:Roxas
by Emi Hikari
Summary: Many months later, and we catch up with Roxas and Mackenzie, and their separate lives.  Add Riku into the mix, and tada! You get this.
1. Introduction:  Lyrics

Intro: Lyrics

Memo: Hello everybody! :) Back with some Kenzie-Roxas action, though not much of them together...:\. Anyway, this is the introduction; these lyrics are meant to set the mood for the whole story, mmkay? Enjoy!

-"Gather up the tears you cried as you were born that day, and fill your heart and shoulders with warmth, and hold all your memories in your hands until the day it all goes away." -Yume no Kakera (Fragments of Dreams)

-"How do you stay awake knowing all I do is think of you? All the things we thought about that will never happen again-if I could just see you..." -How Do You Sleep

-"There's no use asking 'when did I start acting like such a jerk?' Washing dishes, birthday wishes, watching baseball matches-the other future that I wonder 'bout. So many things I wish I didn't wonder 'bout." -Wonder 'Bout

-"Oo, oo, oo, and ah, ah, ah. Give me back my heart, give me back my time. Oo, oo, oo, and ah, ah, ah. What a waste of a woman so fine." -Taking My Money Back

-"If it burns out, if the feeling in my heart fades, I'll follow the free wind to a town far away." -Kutsu wo Narasou (Tap My Feet)

-"I want you to catch me, and yet I'm running around trying to get away; I'm good at getting caught in a trap." -A.S.A.P

-"Maybe this decision was a mistake. You probably don't care what I have to say, but it's been heavy on my mind for months now..." -Do You

-"If there's a lonely night all over the world, the love that connects us will stay the same. I hold my breath, feeling like my heart is melting. Our hearts beat in the same rhythm and softly, gently envelop us." -Kodou (Heartbeat)

-"We touched, we touched before we said goodbye, but the way we were one day just seems to shine." -Hidamari (A Warm Patch of Sun)

-"Bathe me into the crystal waters down below. I want to drink in the beauty of the soul. Let's make believe that this is our world; we'll make it what we want it to." -Inner Glow

-"I miss you, I miss you. I can't ever forget you. I'm clutching close to my heart this fleeting love that fell to pieces with this snow." -you

-"I love you so much, every bit of you more than anyone else-but I'm still alone today. Though I know that when I open my eyes, my dream won't have come true, I'm drowning in you." -Yume no Uta (Dream Song)

-"How do you expect things to get any better if you keep me on the sidelines? Don't you know there's a million things I wanna do? But you gotta meet me halfway, you gotta try." -Not Your Enemy

-"Even if the cruel reality tears us apart, we'll be drawn to each other that much more strongly. I knew I could keep trying no matter, no matter what." -Prisoner of Love

-"For some strange reason, somehow I missed the palm-size warmth of clutching your hand." -Kimi Nanda (It's surely you)

-"Goodbye. Not even my last words will reach you. I've learned how horrible the coldness of parting is. I wanted you to say, even if it was a lie, that you didn't regret the days we spent together-just once would have been enough." -Memorial Address


	2. Chapter 1:  The Dictation of the Future

Chapter 1: The Dictation of the Future

Memo: Welcome back, everyone~ I apologize for not getting to this yesterday, I had literally noooo time hahaha. But here it is! This chapter is a biiiig flashback, so have fun with it! Haha. Also, the whole chapter is told in third person...and this is the only part of the story like that. :)

Roxas sat with his back to the cool wall. The emptiness hadn't left him yet, even after a year of being connected to his original self.

"I hate it," Namine said quietly, leaning against his arm. Her cheek pressed into his shoulder affectionately.

"...I do, too. But you know it's the only way," he pointed out, his blue eyes meeting hers in the darkness. Her gaze wavered first, meaning their plan was set. "Unless you want to be miserable forever."

"...I know," she whispered, looking away.

The two of them sat in silence for a little while longer, still hesitating.

"We should go," Roxas finally declared.

It was like that every night. Roxas and Namine would manage to escape during Sora and Kairi's dreams, and they could do whatever they wanted until morning, when the two woke. But that was precisely what they were going to change.

The two blondes silently made their way down to the little house on the beach, entering the kitchen. Roxas, hands shaking, pulled out a knife from the silverware drawer. He glanced at Namine.

"You go first," she said quickly, nervously.

"Call it blade or handle," Roxas replied, wanting to be fair.

"Blade."

Flipping the knife in the air, Roxas watched in disappointment as the blade lodged itself into the soft flooring.

"You go first," Namine repeated, almost anxious.

It was a long walk back to the treehouse...longer than usual.

_I really am sorry about this_, Roxas thought as he reached Sora, who was fast asleep. _If you could wake up right now, that would be ideal_.

Unfortunately, Sora slept as soundly as he normally did. There wasn't much more Roxas could do to stall. Slowly, sleathily, he kneeled down next to his other, glancing at Namine, who didn't move.

_Well...goodbye_.

Knife in hand, Roxas slowly let his right arm lower itself as his left hand made its way to Sora's throat. The moment the tip of the blade touched his chest, his eyes popped open, and the second his mouth started to open in surprise, Roxas seized his throat roughly, clenching it tightly.

As he buried the knife deeper into Sora's heart, Roxas felt Sora began to struggle beneath him.

"Shh..." he hushed the brunette, whose eyes were confused beyond fright. "Give up. You don't stand a chance now. Let's end this." Sora squeezed his eyes shut, his hands gripping Roxas' in a struggle to escape. But there was nothing for Sora to do now but die, because as the knife got deeper and Sora became weaker, Roxas became stronger. "It's easier for you, much easier. You'll see it's over soon."

Roxas hushed Sora one more time as his sapphire eyes pleaded with the blonde. Soon Sora's hands had relaxed, and the light faded out of his eyes. Roxas quickly turned to Namine, who stood there, paralyzed with fear.

"Before she wakes up," Roxas told her, sliding the knife over to her. She scrambled to pick it up.

He didn't watch what happened with Kairi; instead he sat breathing hard, staring at Sora's lifeless face.

_Why did we just do this_? he wondered, his hands pressing his temples in fear. _What were we thinking_?

"...Roxas?"

Lifting his head, Roxas looked over at Namine, who was standing over Kairi's body, wearing a very strange expression on her face.

"...I can feel," she murmured. "...I feel awful."

Roxas said nothing at first, then pursed his lips.

"It's almost morning. We should leave."

"But where can we go?" Namine asked, following Roxas as he abruptly turned and speed-walked out of the treehouse.

"We can fly to Hollow Bastion. It should be safe there."

Grabbing his hand tightly, Namine jogged after Roxas, her strides not quite as long and not nearly as willing.

"Do we have to leave?" she begged him as they boarded the gummi ship that once belonged to Sora.

"Do you want to stay and be there when his friends find out?" Roxas said, surprised by Namine's reluctancy.

Namine didn't bother answering. She would've been lying if she had denied it, but she didn't want to leave, either. There was still someone she felt connected to on the islands.

"Oh..." Namine took a deep breath in as Riku appeared around a corner.

Quietly swearing under his breath, Roxas got the ship into the air at last as Namine pressed her face against the glass. She saw the strange look Riku gave her, and she could only shake her head in denial. This was not the future she'd had in mind.

"I never wanted this."

"Then why did you let yourself do it?"

Namine let the conversation echo in her mind as she walked through the beautiful woods. It was always so quiet and peaceful in this park. Occasionally one would run into a couple seeking privacy, but today was gloomy, so the silence was solid.

_I really never did want this_, she told herself, frowning. _Riku and Roxas...both of them were right. I could've stopped myself, and I didn't. But now what do I do_?

Namine let a quiet sob escape her throat, then rubbed her bare arms.

_I need to get out of here_, she realized. And she wasn't thinking of the park. She meant the world. _I was never meant to exist. That must be why I'm so unhappy_.

Suddenly Namine's steady pace screeched to a halt, and she inhaled sharply, hardly believing her eyes. There, just a few meters away, was someone's corpse, hanging from a tree branch by a rope.

"Oh...oh..." Gasping over and over, Namine tried to summon the strength to shout for help, but something was stopping her.

"You poor thing!" she finally exclaimed, managing to get the body down. It was a young boy, younger than her. "What could've happened to you? What could've made you..."

She didn't finish her sentence; instead she noticed the smile on his face.

_Did death really bring you so much peace_? she wondered, laying the boy down into the cool grass. _It must be wonderful to be free_.

Slowly, almost in a trance, Namine removed the noose from the boy's neck and stared at it in her hand.

_What do I have to lose_? she thought. _Nothing. I can't choose between them_. _I don't have a choice at this point. ...Roxas will worry_.

Sighing, Namine opened her bag and pulled out a pen and a piece of paper and began to write.

_Sorry, guys_... Riku imagined himself saying to Sora and Kairi. If they would've been there, though, there would've been no need for an apology. In fact, Riku wouldn't have even been in his gummi ship if Sora and Kairi were alive. But the reality was that they weren't. They were dead, gone forever, and Riku didn't see any reason to stay on the islands, either.

_If I stay here, I'll be sad forever_, he reasoned with himself as the ship lifted into the air. Truly, he felt bad for leaving his other friends behind, and his parents, and especially the memories of his old friends, but he was old enough to make a living on his own, and he needed to get away from this tiny, tiny place.

Besides, he was going to Hollow Bastion for more than just freedom.

Namine hadn't visited him in a few months, which was very unusual. Riku figured three things could've happened.

One: Namine had chosen Roxas over him, which was understandable.

Two: Roxas had found out what was going on, and he had taken away her form of transportation as punishment.

Three: She could be dead.

As much as Riku hated to make that an option, he had to because of the last conversation he had had with her. Her attitude had changed so much from the beginning of their little escapades that she was practically another person. And the person she was becoming was one who couldn't decide what her heart wanted because it shouldn't have even been hers in the first place.

_I'll find you, Namine_, Riku thought, closing his eyes in deep thought.

And find her he did, though not in the way he wanted.

As he placed his hand on her cold, dead cheek, Riku felt a deep emptiness well up within him. Now there was no one left for him, and there was nowhere left for him to go. He would have to stay here in Hollow Bastion.

Kissing her hand softly, Riku picked up Namine's lifeless body and placed her in the nearby cree. She floated for a moment, then as she was carried off by the current, sank to the bottom to rest in her watery grave.

Sighing, Riku stood up and walked away, preparing himself for a life in solitude.


	3. Chapter 2: How do you sleep?

Chapter 2: How do you sleep? ( youtube: watch?v=4bsXRqI1WbI)

Memo: Okay, Kenzie is actually in this chapter! XD We're back to the present now, so I hope you enjoy it!

roxas' pov

7:00 am. Another day.

Your hand makes its way to the snooze button but instead slams down on the off button, meaning there's no choice but for you to get up, or you'll be late to work once again. That's not the example you really want to set.

Sighing, you push yourself upright, rubbing the back of your neck, which is drenched in sweat, mostly due to the heat, but somewhat influenced by your antagonizing dreams.

Planting your feet firmly into the carpet, you stand up, stretching a little. You can tell you didn't sleep well again; your body is stiff and tense, uneasy. Oh well...there's not much you can do about it now. You have to go to work. You have nothing else to do anymore but work.

Well, that's not entirely true. You do still have all of your friends...but one...the important one. The one that really mattered. The one that you didn't SHOW really mattered until it was too late.

Anyway...even after six months, you still have all of your friends. You would hang out with them except for one, little thing: _her_. They still hang out with Kenzie, and they tell you that they do. Sometimes there are even pictures to accompany the hurt and guilt you already feel. But you know the motive for their actions. It's all so simple.

They just want to know what happened between you and Kenzie.

And you can't really blame them. After all, everything happened very suddenly. It probably seemed very random to them...and it was. But, oh man, if you told them what happened with Sora and Kairi, you'd be burned alive...or worse, especially if Yuffie got a hold of you.

Staring at your reflection in the mirror, you get a good look of how tired you are. You stick out your tongue to add to the effect. There's no way you can keep going on all depressed like this. You have to make yourself laugh at SOME point.

Today wasn't the day, though, so you continue through your everyday morning routine. The worst part of the routine is always right before you leave, when you have to pass through your living room. Each morning you always half expect Kenzie's bright scarlet hair to pop up on the other side of the couch.

"Leaving already?" she'd say, smiling.

But it's not going to happen, so instead you walk over to the garage door, cell phone in hand-as it always is, with that last hope that she might call.

Your car still brings you a small sense of happiness. It's always fun to drive it, except during the icy storms Hollow Bastion gets in winter time. But it's summer now, and the weather is beautiful, nice enough to roll the top down on your car.

_You would've loved this_, you think, looking along the sidewalks to your right. A couple of girls, probably about your age, gasp when they see you look at them, then burst into a giggling fit. Apparently they had been watching you as you sat at the red light. Well, you might as well tell them you're beyond not interested.

But then the light turns green, and time moves on.

You arrive at your hospital a bit shaken; it seems like there are more and more bad drivers out on the roads these days. Most of them own big cars, ironically. Like it gives them a power trip to see others squeal in their grasp. But the hospital parking lot is safe, and so you pull into your prime parking spot reserved especially for you.

Hey, being the head of an organization does have its perks. Guess Xemnas had something going after all.

Locking your car, you begin your short walk and end up passing through the same automatic doors as you usually do.

"Hey, Roxas," Olette says from the front desk. She smiles, genuine.

"Hey, Olette. So what's going on today?"

your pov

7:00 am. A new day.

Your hand flies to your alarm, smacking the button with great zeal. Sitting upright quickly, you stretch your arms, a small grin coming to your face. As weird as it may seem, you actually LIKE work. Part of it is the munny, but you really do enjoy your coworkers and your customers.

Your feet hit the fuzzy carpet of your rug, and you bounce on over to your bathroom. This townhouse is a blessing, thanks to Yuffie. That girl seriously has connections just about everywhere...but there's no need to complain.

Staring at your reflection, you can't help but crack a smile. Compared to a year ago, you look so much healthier and prettier...and older. And maybe just a little bit wiser?

_Too serious_, you realize, pulling down the skin under your eye and sticking your tongue out playfully. Giggling, you step into the shower, and you get the feeling that today will be another good day.

_I like summer_, you decide as you change into clean clothes, putting your work clothes into a bag. It's been pleasant out lately, not too warm, and so walking to work every day has been a blessing.

There for a while, after the whole ordeal with Roxas happened, things looked very uncertain, and you were frightened of what the future held. But now it's just another adventure, one that you're seriously looking forward to. Especially your fun times with Yuffie, Aerith, and Olette. They're the best friends you could ask for, better than the ones you had before your abduction.

It's too bad that Roxas had to ruin everything, but oh well. You're past that now, and there are other, more exciting things ahead to face, rather than dwelling on what was.

The second your shoes hit the pavement right outside of your townhouse, you smile. Freedom is such a wonderful thing. Independence is one of the best things that can ever happen.

Strolling down the sidewalk, you put on your sunglasses and people watch through the darkened lenses, so people can't know when you're staring at them. It's one of your favorite parts of the day-such a simple thing gives you so much joy.

Today you find several young men around your age-a couple of them are fairly attractive, so you make sure your step has an extra bounce to it when they pass by. The hair in the wind always catches their attention...either that, or it's because it's the color of tomato. Hah.

You notice that there's a ridiculous amount of traffic on the roads, probably the result of an accident. The thought of a car wreck makes your stomach churn. Suddenly you're grateful for never getting your license.

_Hope it's not anyone I care about_, you think as you walk close to the scene. Luckily, the two people involved are unhurt, and both are strangers to you anyway. All good.

Soon you've arrived at your workplace, and you swing the door open.

"Hello!" you call out to the chef, who is running around back in the kitchen, preparing for the lunch rush. No one comes in for sushi in the morning-it's mostly people wanting coffee or snacks in the morning.

"Mah-ken-shii!" Haru, said chef, cries. "You here early?"

"Always," you reply, smiling as you clock in.

Another wonderful day is about to begin.

roxas' pov

"See you tomorrow, Roxas," Aerith says, a small smile appearing on her face.

"Yeah," you say, attempting the same. Nothing happens.

"Hey!" Suddenly Yuffie appears right in front of you, smiling brightly, as always. Some things don't change.

"What?" you ask, raising an eyebrow.

"You should come out with us on Friday," she says. "I-"

"No thanks," you immediately reply. She's tried this trick a thousand times before, trying to get you and Kenzie to talk. Or even just to find out what happened.

"But-"

"Yuffie. No. I know what you're up to. I can see right through you."

Sighing, the ninja pouts in admitted defeat.

"Yeah, okay, I admit you're right, but why is it so hard to just patch things up?" She throws her hands up in the air, obviously frustrated with you. "I don't understand you!"

"I'm okay with that," you assure her, walking away. "See you in the morning."

Another long day. Too long.

It seems like lately the cases you've been taking in have been less and less intriguing. They're mostly abuse cases, both physical and sexual, and they all are simple, common things-though no abuse is truly either.

Anyway, it's become so routine that it's driving you a bit mad.

Slumping into the driver's seat of your car, you slam the door shut, letting your head hit the headrest with a soft thud.

You're eighteen now. Is this seriously how life will be until you retire? There's got to be something you can do about this.

_It's no use_, you tell yourself. _I can't just call her up out of the blue. She'll tell them_.

"Whyyyy meeeee?" you groan pathetically, putting your car into reverse.

You don't feel any better when you get home. It's like her ghost is set on haunting you day in and day out.

Sighing, you sit on the couch and place your cell phone on the coffee table. Another night of waiting. But things are different from what they were a year ago.

A year ago, Namine was the one on whom you waited to call. Her or Hayner, with news of her.

But now, Kenzie is the one you wait on. She's the one you want to call. Even if she calls to say she hates you, at least you'll hear her voice one more time before you die of heartbreak.

This stupid heart... It's what got you into this mess in the first place. It's barely worth what it cost.

9:00 pm. Another long night.

your pov

Throwing your head back, you let out a roar of laughter at the television host's joke, which probably wouldn't be as funny in the afternoon. But because it's nighttime, and you're beat from work, everything is funnier than usual.

It also helps that Yuffie just called, inviting you to another fun Friday night out-her treat. You LOVE it when it's her treat-that means you meet at her house, invade her closet, and come away with some free new clothes. In exchange, you go shopping with her whenever she wants. Give and take, no?

Anyway, the tv you own is small and has a weak picture, but it provides you with much entertainment after longs shifts at work-tonight, for example.

_I should probably call it a night_, you decide, turning off the tv. _I'm getting too tired to function_.

Though it's early, you decide that it's probably wise to get some sleep, since you work the late shift tomorrow. It's not like you have much else to do today. You already did your grocery shopping and the like, so you're set for the week.

_I don't know why I'm so tired_, you wonder, climbing into bed. _I haven't been this wiped out since SpringFest. Ah yes, SpringFest. Good times_.

Grinning broadly, you lay your head down on your pillow and close your eyes.

_Good night, big city_. You yawn, curling up under your sheets.

9:00 pm. Another good day.


	4. Chapter 3:  Wish I Was There

Chapter 3: Wish I Was There (youtube - watch?v=EEzWA8VsJ2k)

Memo: So...want to complete your life? Go look up Jesse McCartney singing Katy Perry's "I Kissed a girl"...life will be better. XD Anyway, here's more of Roxas-no Kenzie in this chapter. Sorry. But I figure you guys like Roxas more, am I right? Ja, das ist gut.

a week later

roxas' pov

"Good morning, sunshine!"

If it's even possible, Hayner's voice just reached a new level of obnoxiousness.

"I can tell by how you said that just now that you want something from me," you reply, unamused at your energetic blonde friend. Usually his annoyingness is funny, but today you're just too tired.

"Well, Mister Enthusiasm, guess what pictures Pence finally developed!"

"Hey!" Pence shouts from across the hospital lobby.

"What pictures?" you say, playing along for now.

"TADA!" Hayner whips out a manilla envelope stuffed with pictures.

"Our SpringFest pics!" Olette cheers, grinning as she bounces over to the two of you.

"You betcha!" Pence says, walking over. "Those were some good times. You wanna take a look on what you missed out on?"

Their eyes stare you down.

"Like I could say no?" you say, a small smile appearing on your face. Hayner grins back and opens the envelope impatiently.

"Wait," Olette says suddenly. "Maybe we shouldn't."

"What? ...Oh, that's right." Hayner's smile disappears in an instant. "Can you handle seeing pictures of _her_? I mean, she was there with us."

Your smile fades as well. Seeing her is always so hard, but maybe if you become immune to looking at her, these feelings will all fade away, too.

"I'm fine," you say after a pause. Olette smiles, as if proud of your decision. You're not so sure yourself.

"Take a look," Hayner says, smiling again as he hands you the huge stack of photos.

"Hah," you laugh, looking through the countless shots of Olette and Hayner being retarded. "You guys are meant to be with your stupidity."

Pence laughs as the mentioned pair sulks.

"What in the world are you guys wearing, anyway?" All of your friends are clad in bright colors, mostly green, with gaudy wings and hats and other oddities tacked on, like a leprechaun's Halloween. "Olette, you look like you want to be a fairy princess or something."

"Because I AM a fairy princess, duh, Roxas," Olette retorts, giggling.

"Hayner seems to think so," Pence comments, looking over your shoulder as you file through more pictures of the couple.

"Back off, man. You're just jealous," Hayner says, reddening along with Olette.

As the two begin to argue, you finally get to the pictures you were sort of dreading and sort of anticipating.

"Huh," you grunt quietly, looking down at a picture of Hayner, Pence, and Kenzie.

"What are you doing to her?" Pence asks Hayner, pointing at Hayner's awkward pose. "Olette, you'd better watch out!"

More arguing. That's fine, though. You'd like to actually _look_ at these pictures.

Kenzie has changed, as you expected she would. She looks older, and healthier, too. Maybe it was better for her to live on her own to get some of her strength back-the strength she lost after her trauma.

Suddenly you come across probably what would be the funniest picture in the bunch if it weren't for the fact that it makes your heart ache beyond the norm.

What should be a simple picture of Olette and Kenzie, posing for the camera, is like a window into what should've been. Shouldn't you have been standing there with her, in some stupid, bright costume, looking ridiculous and yet attractive at the same time?

"Well, I gotta say it, man," Hayner says, watching you as your gaze follows Kenzie's black, buckled shoes up her stocking-covered legs, all the way up her body to her cute, silly face.

"Say what?" you ask, moving on.

"Big mistake by you."

Frowning, you hand the pictures back to your best friend without even looking at him.

"Hey, man, I'm not trying to piss you off-"

"You didn't," you assure him, glancing at him to make him realize you're serious. "You didn't piss me off."

"..."

_I did. I piss me off_, you want to say, but instead you stay silent, mustering up courage enough to smile a little.

"Well, I should get to work. I've wasted enough time talking to you geeks."

"You wish you had a cool fairy princess costume like Olette, huh, Roxas?" Pence teases.

Chuckling, you shake your head and walk away, the lump in your throat lingering.

"Emi?"

The brunette looks up at you, raising an eyebrow as her deep brown eyes peel themselves away from the magazine she's reading. She looks a bit annoyed, as always.

"Roxas?" she responds, mimicing your tone perfectly.

You smirk, shoving your hands into your pockets. "That's all the sarcasm you have for me today?"

"Keep talking, blondie. I've only just begun."

Emi sets the magazine on the table beside her bed. She's become a semi-permanent hospital resident-what Kenzie could've become-because of her high-risk pregnancy and mental instability. Lately she's been doing better, but because of her past and the trauma on top of it, she'll never be normal.

"Have you talked to Aerith yet today?" you ask Emi as she stares you down intently. You can see the permanent dark circles under her eyes, partially from drug abuse and also from stress.

"Yeah...she told me about the option of adoption." Emi shrugs, her lips moving from side to side in indecision. "I don't know if that's what I want to do or not."

"Don't you think that would be best?"

"I think what would be best is if none of this had ever happened in the first place," she replies, her usual smart-ass remarks coming into play.

"Besides the obvious." You smirk, and she does the same. Despite her ill health, she's got spunk.

"Well, we'll see. I still have a couple of months, so I don't see the hurry. Or maybe that's just my immaturity." She shrugs again.

"That's true."

"I would hope so. Hurrying is how I got myself in this whole mess anyway, right?"

Emi breaks eye contact for a moment. You can tell she almost got lost in a flashback again-that could've gotten ugly.

"I can see how you're looking at me," Emi says suddenly under her breath, her gaze becoming harsh. "Don't judge me."

"I can't judge you, trust me," you reply quickly and honestly. "I really don't have the right."

Wrinkling her nose at you, the fifteen year old raises an eyebrow again, and you purposefully do the same, hopefully making her realize that you can't say anything, just as some things are too painful for her to say. Everyone has their own demons to exorcise. Everyone.

"Will you leave me alone now?" she says finally, throughly fed up for the day. "I'd like to finish reading in peace."

"Only if you tell me what you're reading about," you reply, half-smiling. She growls under her breath.

"I'm not reading anything innappropriate again," she snaps, blushing at the memory of the time you caught her flipping past an article about sex toys or something like that.

"So then-"

"It's about cooking," she finally answers, holding up the article to your face. "I want to learn so if I ever get out of here, I can at least support myself, and _maybe_ my daughter."

"It's a girl, then?"

"No, I'm planning on referring to my son as a girl."

A pause.

"...You didn't seriously just believe that, did you?" Emi asks, laughing.

"Well, you _would_."

"Would not."

"Would too."

"Would not."

"Would-"

"Roxas?"

You quickly whip your head around to see Yuffie standing there, amused.

"Come on, you said you'd help me an' Olette sort some files tonight," she insists, pouting a bit.

"...I did, didn't I?" You sigh, turning back to Emi, who has already begun reading again. "I'll be out in a minute."

"If you're not, I'll beat you up~!" Yuffie calls out, walking down the hallway. You ignore the threat. You're used to it.

"Say..." Emi glances up at you, then averts her eyes. "...That little red-head that used to follow you around..." She pauses, as if waiting for your recognition. You think it's funny how Emi refers to Kenzie as "little" when Kenzie is two years older than her. "...Well, whatever happened to her?"

"She...left. We had a...disagreement."

"Ah. I understand."

_No, you don't_, you feel like saying, but instead you nod once and leave the room, a frown conquering your profile once more.


	5. Chapter 4:  Taking My Money Back

Chapter 4: Taking My Money Back (youtube: watch?v=7PGd9hssgUg)

Memo: Hiiii~ I'm sorry for the delayed posting, I had midterms ; But now I'm about to be on spring break! :D Okay, and we switch again! No Roxas this chapter-but Kenzie's back! :D After this it gets REALLY interesting...not that it isn't already. ;) Okay, continue! Thanks for reading~

your pov

"See you later, Mackenzie!" your favorite co-worker, Shasta, shouts as you walk toward the door.

"Tomorrow!" you assure her, waving as best you can while carrying your sushi-scented work clothes in your arms.

A blast of warm air hits your face as you step outside into the calm summer air. End of May already. It seems like it was just winter.

Summer is better, though, and it certainly provides for better walking conditions. Considering you live even farther away from your work than before, that's a blessing. But today you're not going to your house. Not yet.

As always, you occupy your restless mind by picking out attractive guys that pass you on your way to Yuffie's house. It's Friday, so that means it's party time with Yuffie and Aerith. And, of course, Cloud, and Leon and Rinoa, too. If you're lucky, Cid might show up, but he usually spends his Friday nights off at the bar smoking cigars all night.

Anyway, this is your favorite part of the week. Yuffie and Aerith are the best friends you could ever ask for, even though they're older. But that's actually kind of nice, since they go through everything before you do and you get to learn from their stupid mistakes.

That would've been nice about six months ago. They should've told you never to fall in love.

Well, whatever. It's never going to happen again. You're going to guard your heart until the day you die.

You still haven't had the guts to delete Roxas' cell number out of your phonebook, and you don't really know why. It's so easy-literally it takes two button clicks and it's over. So why can't you delete it?

There's a little bit of lingering guilt there still, and that's all that's stopping you. Otherwise, you'd delete it and it'd all be over. But that tiny percentage of guilt, less than one percent, is the barrier.

Finally you get to Yuffie's place, just in time for some good cooking from Aerith, or maybe some takeout food, courteosy of Yuffie's laziness. Either one will work tonight.

"Hello?" you call out, knocking on the door.

"Mackenzie, my little darling!" Yuffie shouts from the other side. You can't help but laugh. "I'll be just a second. I'm pouring drinks."

If Yuffie is helping with dinner, then you must be having takeout. Shweet.

"Fwah!" Yuffie cries, making her out sound effect as she throws open her front door. "Come in come in come in sit down sit down sit down!"

Still grinning, you hurry inside into the cool a/c. Leon and Rinoa are sitting on the couch, both looking positively grumpy.

"What, did you catch the Cloud disease?" you ask Leon, who only gives you an irritated look.

"I heard that," Cloud snaps from the kitchen.

"Don't care," you retort, smiling at the sulking brunettes. To your surprise, neither of them respond. What, are they made of stone now?

"Mackenzie, will you come in the kitchen?" Yuffie asks, obviously busy setting the big table meant for nights such as this.

Again, to your surprise, there is no evidence of takeout. Instead, Aerith and Cloud are making dinner, while Yuffie rushes around. Then it hits you-Yuffie is doing Rinoa's usual job.

"Okay, what's going on?" you murmur, looking at the three of them. You try to look accusatory, but you don't know if you're successful until Yuffie finally cracks.

"Okay, fine," Yuffie says, letting the silverware clatter onto the table where it may. "Come with me. Aeri, you're on your own with Cloud."

"'Kay," Aerith says, still sounding cheerful as Yuffie drags you away into her room.

"What's going on?" you hiss as soon as the door shuts. Yuffie whips around, grinning.

"This is both good news and bad news: Rinoa and Leon are in a big fight right now."

"What? _Why_?"

"I don't know. I think Rinoa is jealous of the fact that Leon's inner circles contains more females than just her. Specifically, me."

"You? But you guys-"

"I know, we've been friends since forever. Fifteen years and counting. And what do they have? Five years, maybe? Anyway, I guess now Rinoa wants him to choose?"

"Choose?" you echo, astonished. Rinoa always seemed so nice! "Between you and her?"

"Exactly. She's an idiot. Who in their right mind would make the person they love most choose between his best friend and girlfriend?"

"But I don't understand, not entirely," you admit, frowning. "You said it was good news, too. This is only tearing you guys apart."

"But there's a catch in all of this, Mackenzie," Yuffie replies, grinning mischieviously. "If Leon chooses me over her, then Rinoa will break up with him."

"That's bad, though. That's just more drama-"

"Ah, but see past the bad stuff for a moment." Yuffie takes you by the shoulders and shakes you a little. "If Rinoa and Leon split, Leon is _single_. And if he chose me over her, that means I am important to him, you follow?"

"I...do," you gasp, your jaw dropping. "So...you think-?"

"Right...we could end up as more than friends. Friends with some very amazing benefits."

Yuffie lets out a quiet but crazy little giggle, and you soon join her.

"Hey, you two-"

Surprised, you and Yuffie yelp as Aerith pokes her head into the room.

"Hate to break up the party, but dinner's almost ready," she says sweetly.

"Are Leon and Rinoa joining us?" you ask before Yuffie can say anything.

"One of them is. Guess which."

"Leon?" you and Yuffie gasp in unison. Aerith just smiles, closing the door behind her as she leaves.

A minor freakout occurs.

aerith's pov

In all the many years you've known Yuffie, you've never seen her so nervously animated before, especially in front of you. But whatever Leon wanted to talk to her about must've really shaken her up.

"Soooo?" Mackenzie whispers as Yuffie trots into your room, shutting the door behind her. You can see the energy on fire in her dark eyes.

She inhales, and then opens her mouth to speak, but all that comes out is a tiny squeak. The three of you burst into hysterics.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry," she gasps, hurrying over to the bed where you and Mackenzie are sitting. "I'm just kind of freaking out right now."

"We couldn't tell or anything," Mackenzie says, grinning from ear to ear. You'd have never guessed that a year ago she was dying.

"What did Leon say?" you ask, smiling in anticipation. Yuffie makes a little chirping noise of excitement.

"Okay, okay, give me a second to calm down. Whoo." The little ninja fans her face quickly, exhaling a few times. "Okay, I'm okay now. Anyway, what was it you asked me? What do you want to know?"

"What did he say!" you and Mackenzie cry in unison, causing Yuffie to giggle.

"Right. Well, apparently, Rinoa got so fed up with Leon refusing to choose between us that she just up and left. Which, according to Leon, was just fine with him, since he was going to choose me over her anyway."

"Whhhhaaaaa?" Mackenzie leans forward, enthralled. "And this means?"

"Well, nothing right now..."

"How disappointing..." Mackenzie makes a pathetic face at you, and you grin.

"But he did say that he felt that our friendship had been neglected ever since Rinoa came into the picture, and that we needed to-and I quote-work on that some more."

"Ahhh, so cute!" Mackenzie falls back on the bed, smiling brightly with her eyes closed.

"Your turn, then," you say, forcing her eyes open.

"What?" she gasps, sitting up again.

"Aeri's right," Yuffie agrees, nodding at you. You can tell her mind is clicking with yours perfectly. "It's your turn. We need to find you a guy."

"Or, better yet, we need to send you out with the skills to find your own."

Yuffie raises an eyebrow at you in understanding. You both know it: Mackenzie needs to find someone so she can get over what happened with her and Roxas. And Roxas needs to find another girl.

Your greatest hope, you'll admit, is that the two of them get back together on their own, but you know that whatever happened between them was a big deal, and so now the only option is to get them to press onward. Mackenzie will definitely handle it better than Roxas.

"...What am I supposed to do?" Mackenzie asks, cocking her head to one side. "To find a guy?"

"Go hunting in your best dress," Yuffie replies, grinning. Mackenzie considers this for a moment.

"Just go into places you think singles hang out in," you add.

"Anywhere but where you work."

"Yeah, that's just awkward."

Mackenzie lets out a giggle, and you can tell by her face that you've won her over with the idea.

"Where do you two suggest?" she asks, bright-eyed for the first time in a while.

"Not movie theaters," Yuffie answers quickly.

"Dance clubs," you reply.

"No, I couldn't..." Mackenzie frowns, and you immediately understand.

"Lounges," Yuffie mentions.

"Coffee shops," you suggest.

"Hmmm...I like the sound of coffee," Mackenzie says, smirking.

"Then try it. You never know."

"Bookstores...the park..." Yuffie continues to name off places as you and Mackenzie talk.

"You can just go in to use the computer for a while-y'know, look up the weather and other things. Stick around for a couple of hours, and then if no one shows up, then leave and try again somewhere else."

"You really think it'll work?" Mackenzie asks, looking a little hopeful.

"I think so," Yuffie says, nodding sincerely. "Just don't judge by looks. And don't always make the first move."

"But don't let a good one get away," you add, grinning.

"Truth," Mackenzie says, giggling. "Okay, I'll try it tomorrow. After I freshen up from work, I'll go get some coffee and sit around." She slids off of the bed, standing. "Thanks. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Me either," Yuffie jokes, and you all laugh, but it's so true. Mackenzie needs you and Yuffie now more than ever, and she's brought you so much joy, like a wonderful little sister. The least you can do is help her find love again.

If it's possible for her to.


	6. Chapter 5: Deja Vu

Chapter 5: Deja Vu (youtube = watch?v=USG1Sw8Yr18)

Memo: Again, no Roxas. :( Hehe, have any of you ever seen Summerland? It's like Roxas comes alive...XD Anywho, get ready for some crazycrazy drama.

the next day

your pov

"Well, today's the day," you tell yourself, looking into the mirror in your bathroom. "I just took a shower, and after I get ready, I'll go to that little coffee shop a couple blocks down, hang out at the cybercafe, then it's dinner at Yuffie's."

You smile at your reflection, whose face is beaming with sheer glee. For some reason, you are REALLY looking forward to your boy hunt. You've never been boy crazy, but then again, you've never had the opportunity or encouragement to be. So, this should be a grand adventure...

Anyway, you finish getting ready, making sure you don't look desperate, and soon it's time to head out into the big world.

_I feel bouncy and retardedly hyper_, you realize as you walk/strut down the sidewalk. _Calm down, Mackenzie. Keep it cool. Remember, I do have things to do_.

And that's no lie. You plan on checking up on the weather, the news, some shopping, and whatever else you happen to come across that seems interesting. This way, even if you leave alone, the trip wasn't a waste of time.

Luckily for you, the coffee shop is well taken care of, and the air conditioning is on full blast. It's relatively busy, but still quiet enough to concentrate.

_First order of business: what do I want_...? you ask yourself, tapping your chin with your index finger. _Raspberry tea sounds good_.

After ordering, you notice that none of the employees are cute, so that narrows it down some. But Yuffie and Aerith were right: there are plenty of singles sitting around, and couples, too.

Your next order of business-finding a free computer-turns out to be hopeless. There are a few empty seats available, but the three computers there are being used.

"Excuse me?" you say to a nice-looking young man, maybe a couple of years older than you.

"Whassup?" he asks, not looking at you.

"When you're finished using that computer, may I use it, please?"

"Are you willing to wait another few hours?" he replies, glancing at you. You then realize what he's doing: playing some online computer game.

"..." You don't bother answering; you can see you've already lost his interest.

Defeated, you sink down into a lounge chair, sipping your cool tea in frustration.

Since you have nothing better to do, you start to look around the small shop, scanning for any young men you might have missed.

At this point, ll of the booths are either empty or filled with couples or groups of friends, most of them texting on their phones and not even talking to each other between sips of lattes and fruit drinks. Were you ever that spoiled as a preteen?

The people at the computer are female, except for the gamer guy you talked to a few minutes ago. He seems really wrapped up in whatever he's playing, so you figure after another look around you'll probably leave. Who knows when the two women will be done.

Your eyes wander up to the bar stools and individual tables. Most of them are empty, except for a few-one in particular catches your eye.

You can't see his face, but a young man with sort-of long, silver hair is sitting by himself, facing away from you, in a booth facing the window. He seems to be lost in thought, not unlike you right now. You'd think he was a girl, due to the hair length, but you can tell by his build that he is definitely male. In fact, he looks pretty attractive from behind. You wish you could get a good look at his face.

_I wonder if he's waiting for someone_, you think, unable to stop staring at him. _If he's not, maybe I should try talking to him. He might be nice_.

...Actually, he seems a little familiar. You're sure you've never seen him before in your life, but for some reason, he looks like someone you might know.

Then, suddenly, it hits you.

"Ohmigawd," you mouth, tensing up. "Riku?"

Roxas had said that Riku had long, silver hair, and this guy fits the bill on that one. He also looks a couple of years older than you-again, fitting the vague description Roxas had given you. But could it really be him?

Now you're curious. Now you've got to know. Now you basically HAVE to go over there and ask him.

If it's him, maybe you can finally get the full story of the Roxas-Namine saga. And if it's not him, then it's a little mistake, and you might meet a cute guy. It's a win-win situation.

_I'll wait a couple more minutes, in case he has a girlfriend that shows up_, you tell yourself, glancing at your watch.

Those couple of minutes pass by very, very slowly, but soon time is up, and so you muster up your courage, get up from the comfy chair, and march yourself over to the mystery man.

"Um, excuse me?" you say, practically in a squeak. You're shocked he hears you.

The man doesn't respond with words; instead he turns and looks up at you from his seat, a little confused and mostly irritated. But his eyes-oh _my_! You've never seen such beautiful eyes on anyone before! They're the color of the ocean-a calm, aqua color. For a moment you can't speak, you're so caught up in his amazing face.

If this _is_ Riku, you can understand Namine's attraction to him.

"...Are you...are you Riku?" you ask, hesitating just a bit. He stares at you again, blank-faced. He's good at this whole hide-your-emotions thing.

"If I am, why do you care?" he finally replies, raising an eyebrow. You're startled for a minute, then immediately regain composure.

"Because I need to know," you say quietly. "Please, just answer me."

"...I am," he says at last, turning away from you. "Now you have to tell me who _you_ are, and why you care about who _I_ am."

"My name is Mackenzie Harding," you answer, smiling. "I know Roxas."

Riku's whole body freezes at the mention of Roxas.

"You...you know Roxas?" he murmurs, glancing up at you.

"Knew him, I guess I should say," you correct yourself.

"...Sit down," Riku tells you, and you obey without a second thought.

riku's pov

You're not sure who this girl is supposed to be, or how she knows Roxas, but she definitely has your attention now. And if she knows you, she's bound to have questions, just like you do now.

"Who are you, exactly?" you ask the red-head as she sits down across from you. She's kind of pretty...in fact, she looks a little bit familiar. Maybe you've seen her around town or something.

She giggles a little bit at your question.

"I already said, my name is Mackenzie," she replies, smiling at you.

"Yeah, I got that," you say, smirking.

"Then what do you not get?" she asks, matching your sarcasm and your smirk. Huh. You like her already.

"What I mean is, why are you familiar? I know we've never met-"

"Is it because you knew my brother, too?" she says, tilting her head to one side while taking a sip of her tea.

"Your brother?" Can she be any more confusing?

"Well, my brother's Nobody, I guess." Yep, she can. "My brother's name was Lea-"

"Axel?" you inquire, making the connection immediately. Now her physical appearance-and sarcasm-makes sense.

"Yeah, so you knew him?" she repeats, enthusiastic.

"Yeah. He was alright."

"..." She seems a little saddened by the fact that you have to refer to him in past tense, so you try to revert the subject back to the original point: why the hell is she interested in you?

"So what made you come over here?" you ask her, raising an eyebrow. She immediately blushes.

"Oh, um, don't think I'm too weird or anything," she says quickly, shaking her head.

_Too late_, you want to say, but you bite your tongue.

"The thing is...well, I know what happened to Namine-kind of," she continues, breaking eye contact. "But I wanted another opinion, so to speak. I want the full story, not just Roxas' side. And since I obviously can't go to Namine, I thought I'd come to you. But I never thought I'd actually ever _meet_ you."

"I don't want to sound rude," you say, frowning, "but why were you with Roxas in the first place? Not to make him sound like a total jackass, but I am still a little bit...bitter."

"I understand completely," Mackenzie says quickly, her whole facial expression darkening. Now you're _really_ getting curious. "But, to answer your question, Roxas saved me. I was abducted, and he and his friends saved me. You might know Yuffie? Or Aerith?"

"I do," you confirm, half-smiling. Too bad you can't openly talk to them like the good old days. If they ever knew what had happened...it'd break their hearts. Personally, you've had enough of that for a lifetime and a half.

"So?" Mackenzie stares at you again, curiosity written all over her pretty face.

"So what?"

"Soooo? Can you tell me your side of the story?"

"About Namine?" You hesitate-how do you know you can trust her?

"You don't trust me, do you?" she asks, reading your mind.

"Deja vu," you both say, then laugh at the coincidence.

"That was weird," she admits, grinning. "But seriously, you don't trust me? What can I do to earn it?"

"...Tell me something not just anybody would know about Roxas or Namine, or one of my other friends," you answer after a moment.

Mackenzie leans back against the booth, thinking hard while finishing off her tea. As she thinks, you continue to judge her. She seems honest enough-after all, how many females would honestly just approach you with information about your ex-girlfriend and worst nightmare?

"Yuffie has a thing for Leon," she suddenly replies. Shocked, you stare at her, and she stares back, triumphant.

"...You really do know them, then," you say, sighing.

"Then tell me," she pleads.

"Not here," you reply. "This kind of business shouldn't be discussed in public coffee shops."

"Right, 'cause there are sooo many people around," she says, rolling her eyes playfully. You can't help but smile.

"Well, would you want to come to my place?" you offer. "I just have a tiny apartment nearby. It's not much, but at least I know it'll be private."

your pov

Hooooold up.

Did Riku seriously just ask you to go to his house? Apartment, whatever. Same difference. Seems like you might end up with a guy after all?

Yeah right. You can tell he's still heartbroken over Namine, considering that whenever you mention her name, he gets this sad, puppy-dog look on his face, not all that unlike Roxas.

"Well, okay," you say after considering his offer.

"Would you like to stay for dinner?" he asks, standing.

"Hmm, let me ask Yuffie if I should," you tease him.

"Really? Don't tell her it's me," he says.

"I understand, I won't," you assure him, texting Yuffie.

"found a boy...i won't be dinner 2night :]"

"OMG HELL YES GO TO DINNER W/ HIM"

"Yuffie says it's okay," you reply, grinning as you pocket your phone.

To your surprise, Riku holds out his hand, offering to help you out of the booth. What a gentleman! Wow.

"I hope you don't mind walking," he says, leading you out.

"Not at all," you tell him, smiling. He doesn't smile back with his mouth, but his eyes have a glowing look to them, moreso than when you first saw him earlier. Hm.


	7. Chapter 6: The Third Half

Chapter 6: The Third Half (youtube = watch?v=tPinnWw14Lk)

Memo: You might be saying, "Wtf, there can't be a third half." I say, "Duh. There _can't_ be three halves. Therefore, someone's half must go away." FORESHADOWING! :D And more to come in this chapter! Lots of irony. XP Again, no Roxas this time around-next chapter he's back.

your pov

"It's not much, sorry," Riku says as soon as you step into his apartment. The first thing you notice is how AMAZING it smells.

"No, I like it," you assure him, smiling as sincerely as you can. Riku doesn't seem to buy it, but he doesn't bother questioning you.

"Do you want anything to eat or drink?" he asks you, then laughs abruptly. "We just came from a coffee shop, of course not. Sorry. Can you tell I don't have people over very often?"

You can't help but laugh. Now that he seems comfortable with you, his personality is beginning to shine through. And, oh, what a personality it is...

"If it makes you feel any better, I've never been in that position before, either," you say, grinning as he sits down across from where you're standing.

"Sit," he commands you, and you immediately oblige. "So...Mackenzie...what exactly do you already know?"

"Depends on which topic we're going to cover," you reply.

"Whatever topic you want," he says with a smirk that makes you think he meant it promiscuously. Did he? Maybe _that's_ why Namine fell for him...

"Well...I know Roxas and Namine killed Sora and Kairi, and Namine cheated on Roxas with you. I know Sora and Kairi were your best friends."

"That's a good chunk of the story right there," he tells you, frowning.

"Yeah, I figured as much." You shrug. "What I'm curious to know is _your_ side of this whole thing."

"My side?"

"Yeah. I mean, how did you even _know_ Namine? What happened between you two? And what've you been doing all this time after Sora and Kairi died?"

"..." Riku hesitates, glancing at you, then staring at the carpet beneath your feet.

"I'll answer you, under one condition," he finally says. You nod, willing to take the risk. "Since I'm answering three questions for you, you have to answer three questions for me."

"So clever," you say, smirking at him. "But yeah, that's fine."

"I'll go first answering them, then," he says, tapping his index finger on the arm of the couch. "I knew Namine because she was Kairi's Nobody, just like I knew Roxas because he was Sora's Nobody. I even knew that they were the Nobodies before Sora and Kairi knew they even _had _Nobodies."

"You mean, Sora and Kairi never knew Roxas and Namine existed?" you ask, shocked.

"For a long time, no. Sora was asleep for a year while Roxas existed in the Organization, and Kairi was on our home islands for that year, and neither of them knew about Roxas or Namine. _Roxas_ didn't even know Namine. The only people who knew everything about everyone were Namine and me. I met Namine through a man named Ansem the Wise. I just knew she was in charge of taking care of Sora, and I eventually found out she was Kairi's Nobody.

"We just always helped each other out. During that year while Sora was asleep, we just had each other for company, so I think that's when I got to know her better. But I didn't think of it, you know? She was a Nobody, meaning she couldn't feel-so no matter what I felt, she would never be able to feel the same way."

"..." You don't say anything; this is such a sad little love story...

"And then she kind of disappeared for a while, until Sora and Kairi were together again," Riku continues, frowning. "Because she had rejoined with Kairi, she could kind of feel what Kairi felt."

"But...?" You frown, too. What Kairi felt? Does he really mean what you think he means?

"That's why I can't be too mad at Roxas for killing Sora...because I kind of killed him mentally, I think. I mean, after being in the darkness for so long, and then...Kairi..."

"...Are you saying...Kairi loved you, too?" you ask, raising your eyebrows ever so slightly. Riku doesn't answer with words, but you can tell by the look on his face that it's true. "So...Kairi loved you and Sora, then Namine loved both you and Roxas?"

"Yeah, I guess that's the simplest way to explain it," he replies at last. "Anyway, Namine and Roxas would appear at night while Kairi and Sora slept, and sometimes, if one of them would take a nap during the day, their Nobody would appear. So sometimes Kairi would fall asleep, and Namine would be free of Roxas, and she would come find me.

"So when Namine and Roxas left...I just kind of stayed at home and did nothing, even though I had other friends." Riku shrugs. "I felt more guilty than ever, and then one night Namine came back to the islands to try to talk me into moving here so she could see me again. I didn't listen to her, but she came out to see me more and more often. And then, finally, she and I had a conversation that I think pretty much sealed the deal for her death."

"Why? What did you say?" you ask, totally engrossed. Who knew this would be so interesting? It's like a real-life television drama!

"Me? I didn't say much," Riku says, frowning. "She basically broke down and said she couldn't choose between Roxas and me, and she wanted to me to make the decision for her. I told her I couldn't, that I had already ruined enough relationships to last a lifetime, and she blew up. She was so unhappy, and I think that drove her to her death.

"She didn't visit for a long time, so I finally decided to move out here, and I found her, dead, like I had suspected. So, since then, I've just been here, trying to stay out of other people's business. My parents send munny, I have a job, but that's about it. And that's that."

riku's pov

"...I know you just said you wanted to stay out of other people's business," Mackenzie says with a small smile, "but weren't you going to ask me something, too?"

"Huh, yeah," you say, smirking. "I can't believe you brought that back up. Aren't you afraid I'm going to humiliate you?"

"No," she replies, matching your smirk. "Because if you try to, I have so much dirt on you now that you're not even a threat anymore."

"Touche..."

She giggles, sitting back into the couch. "So try me."

"Okay, if you say so. You said earlier that Roxas and his friends rescued you...who abducted you?"

"Emmm..." She thinks for a moment. "I don't recall his name, because I've only heard it once or twice. But I know he was an Organization member...and he was a higher rank than my brother...er...Axel." She shakes her head, obviously weirded out by referring to her brother as someone else. Poor thing. "But it was awful. I was there for a long time before Roxas and the others found me."

"Ready for question two?" you ask her. She nods, amused. "Why did you say you 'knew' Roxas? He's not dead, is he?"

"Haha, not that I know of," she replies, struggling to stay cheerful. "I'm sure I would've heard about it if he had. No, he and I...well, after I got out of the hospital, I went to live with him, since I had no family left. And...I guess I kind of fell in love with him, even though I knew his heart was set on Namine. But then...he found her body, and...he told me about how he killed Sora and Kairi.

"And it's not the fact that he killed them that bothers me so much, because I didn't even know who they were. It's that he was so tactless about it, and that he hid it for so long, and that he let me trust him so much... I guess I had built up this squeaky-clean image of him, and when it wasn't true, I..."

"I understand," you say quickly as Mackenzie swallows hard. "Don't cry. You're not allowed to cry in front of me."

She laughs, wiping her eyes. "Why not?"

"I don't know. It bothers me, because I can't do anything about it," you admit, shrugging.

"You just did," she argues, smiling. "You made me laugh with your ridiculous nonsense about crying girls."

You chuckle quietly.

"Anyway..." Mackenzie huffs a sigh, already cured. "It's been probably...six months since I've talked to or even seen Roxas, so I don't know how he's been or anything. Yuffie and the others know I hate hearing about him, so they don't talk about him unless they find it absolutely necessary.

"And I don't live with him anymore. Yuffie bought me a townhouse, and I'm working to pay her back. I've almost paid it all off."

She seems very proud of herself. You can't really blame her. She's very strong-willed and strong-hearted...you could tell that when she first approached you.

"Well? You have one more question for me." Mackenzie crosses her arms, raising an eyebrow. Now she _definitely_ looks like Axel. "What's it gonna be?"

"Hmm..." You pretend to contemplate. "...What are you doing next week?"

Mackenzie lets out a loud laugh, then slaps her hands over her mouth quickly.

"Hehe, I'm sorry, that was rude," she admits, blushing. "Is that seriously your question?"

"Do I look like I'm kidding?" you tell her, raising an eyebrow. She studies you.

"No, I guess not."

"Well, then? Are you ever going to answer me?"

"Hmmm...I don't know what I'm doing. Working. Friday nights I hang out with Aerith and Yuffie." She smiles playfully, making herself look like a huge flirt. Yes... "Maybe we can talk it over during dinner?"

"Maybe," you say, smiling.

at dinner

your pov

This is just plain crazy. This whole day has been the absolute definition of crazy...and unrealistic. Add that to the list, too.

Who knew six months ago that you would be sitting at the dinner table of Riku, in his house, talking to him-can you add flirting with him to that list? Yes...you most certainly can.

"I feel like you're the opposite of the male stereotype," you tell Riku, "even though you look the part."

"What makes you say that?" he asks, raising his eyebrow at you. In the past hour you've noticed that raising an eyebrow and smirking are his ways of flirting while continuing the conversation without a hitch. No wonder he had Kairi and Namine wrapped around his fingers. Are you next? Let's hope so.

"You can cook," you reply, giggling. He rolls his eyes at you.

"Does that mean you liked it?"

"Yes," you say, nodding as sincerely as you can.

"Well, thank you."

"You're welcome."

"What else makes me non-stereotypical?" he asks, getting up and taking your plate away.

"You're unusually polite," you tell him, turning to look at him as he heads to the sink.

"Well, the way I figure it, I've already pissed enough people off by messing up their personal lives that I'd better make it up by being as tactful and as polite as I can."

"If it makes you feel any better, you're not messing up my life," you say, turning around to hide your reddening cheeks. "Today was the most fun I've had in a while."

"...Me, too," he admits quietly.

_Don't be afraid to fall in love with me_, you want to say. _I won't ever hurt you like they did_.

"...It's getting kind of late," Riku tells you.

"No one is around to worry about me," you assure him, smiling. He smiles back.

"Do you want me to walk you home?"

"If you want to."

Before long, you're back at your house, standing on the front steps.

"Thank you for walking me home...and for dinner...and for everything else," you say, grinning. Riku smiles back.

"It's nothing. I'm looking forward to Tuesday," he says. You nod enthusiastically.

"Well...good night."

"Good night, Mackenzie." Riku smiles one last time, then turns and walks away.

You also turn and start to unlock your door when suddenly you hear Riku shout something.

"Hey!" he says.

_Oh good golly_, you think. _If he kisses me goodnight I will pee my pants_.

"...What's your cell number? In case I need to get a hold of you."

"Oh, yeah, good idea," you say, trying to mask your disappointment.

After that short ordeal, he leaves again, and you retire in peace, flopping onto your couch.

Suddenly your phone buzzes, muffled by your bag and body.

"Yuffie..." you mutter to yourself, pulling out your phone. But, to your surprise, it's not.

"Remember what I said earlier tonight about staying out of people's business?"

"Yesss?" you reply, your heart pounding.

"You're different...you're worth it."


	8. Chapter 7:  Do you?

Chapter 7: Do you? (youtube - watch?v=gfQ3RFkd9so)

Memo: I'm sorry it took forever to get this up. My work schedule was mean. :( I feel so sorry for Roxas. I just wanna give him a BIG HUG! DX Heh, anyway, more story for ye! Enjoy, and thanks for reading~

your pov

The second you walk through the hospital's automatic doors the next morning, you get the feeling you're no longer safe. Sure enough, you glance up from your cell phone, and suddenly you're engulfed by the force of nosy friends.

"Ouch, you're hurting me," you say, but Yuffie and Aerith don't seem to care one bit.

"TELL US ABOUT LAST NIGHT!" Yuffie screams in one ear.

"TELL US ABOUT YOUR DATE!" Aerith shouts into the other.

"Is he cute?"

"How old is he?"

"Is he cute?"

"Do you think he likes you, too?"

"Is he cute?"

"Do you get to see him again?"

"Oh my gosh, are you texting him right now?"

Yuffie tries to steal your phone, but you hold onto it tightly, shaking your head.

"I'm not," you assure her. "It's my friend from work."

"Suuure it is," Yuffie says, releasing your poor phone. "So anyway, tell us about your fun night!"

"I can't say too much," you admit. "I have to leave in, like, ten minutes."

"That's enough time to tell us your first impression," Aerith replies, crossing her arms.

"...Fine. Well, to answer all of your questions... He's nineteen. I _do_ think he likes me, too."

At this, Yuffie lets out such a high-pitch squeal that several people turn and look at you, giving you confused looks. You sigh, embarrassed.

"Anyway, I can't wait to see him again."

"When will you see him again?" Aerith asks as Yuffie calms down.

"Tuesday," you reply, grinning. "And yes, Yuffie, he's cute. He's _really_, really cute."

"When can we meet him?" she practically screams.

"If you're going to keep acting like that, then never," you tease her. She pouts.

"Never" is the real answer, though. If they ever see Riku again, that will create some sticky situtations for all of you. So, in reality, if you end up wanting to be with Riku...forever...then you'll have to elope. Not that that's all that bad...

"What did you guys end up doing for dinner?" Aerith asks, getting you back on track.

"He made dinner for us," you reply, texting Shasta as you talk with them. She's asking you the same sort of questions. "He's an excellent cook."

"He sounds like...a perfect bachelor," Aerith says, giggling.

"And a perfect boyfriend!" Yuffie cries, clapping her hands together excitedly.

"I wish..." you mutter under your breath.

"Sounds like it won't be long before you're official, if you're already seeing him again in a couple of days..." Aerith points out, smiling. You smile, too.

"So, what's his name?" Yuffie asks.

You were hoping that question wouldn't present itself.

But as if to save your butt from awkwardness, your phone vibrates, startling you.

"IS IT HIM!" Yuffie gasps.

"No," you reply, opening the text. But, to your surprise and genuine delight, it _is_ from Riku. Thankfully, your phone doesn't recognize the number yet, so his name doesn't show up in the text.

"Hey, how's your day been so far?" it reads.

"It _is_ from him," you murmur, texting him back.

Yuffie silently screams into her hands, bouncing in place.

"Oh, snap," you say, looking at your watch. "I need to get going."

"Oh yeah, you have work," Aerith says, nodding. "Talk to you later, then?"

"Maybe," you reply, shrugging. "Bye, you guys."

Before either of them can respond, you abruptly turn and walk away. Hopefully they won't have another chance to ask you his name.

But if they do, what will you say? You'll have to make up a fake name. Hmm...

Maybe Riku can help you with that.

roxas' pov

_It's turning out to be just another boring day at work_, you realize as you sort through charts in the front of the hospital. ..._That's unusual_.

Usually something at work either goes wrong or is really sad. Today has just been...regular. It's only a matter of time before something changes that.

"Do you need any help with those?" Olette asks you, smiling from her seat behind the front desk. You smile back.

"Nah, I'm almost done," you reply. "Thanks, though."

"No problem. I need something to do. It's been a slow day."

"It has," you agree, sighing. _And I still have three hours left of my shift. Today is dragging on so slowly_...

Suddenly the automatic doors at the front open, and both you and Olette perk up considerably. But you both relax when Yuffie and Aerith walk in from their dinner breaks. They get to leave soon. Lucky them. Though they have been here longer.

You try to get their attention, but the two are wrapped up in conversation, whispering to each other furiously, like they're being timed. And, come to think of it, they've been like that ever since you got here.

Now you're curious. Are they talking about you? That wouldn't be too big of a surprise.

"Yo."

You turn to see Hayner walking over to you.

"Hey," you say, nodding at him. He nods back.

"I was going to help you out, but I can see you're almost done," Hayner says, looking at the charts stacked on the desk.

"Yeah...it didn't take too long," you sigh. "Which is too bad. I needed something to do."

"Slow day, right?"

"Right..."

You both sigh in unison, then chuckle at the coincidence.

"Say, do you know what Yuffie and Aerith have been going on about all day?" you ask, throwing the topic out there. If he knows, you want to know, too.

"Well..." Hayner hesitates, meaning that he knows, but isn't sure if he wants to tell you.

"Well, what?"

"...I don't know if you want to know."

"Why would I not want to know? They keep giving me funny looks and ignore me whenever I try to get their attention."

"And that's different from the norm in what way?"

You frown as Hayner laughs at his own joke. Olette giggles in the background.

"Olette, you too...?" you say, pouting.

"Sorry..." she murmurs.

"Anyway, if you really are sure you want to know, I'll tell you, but I'm warning you: it's not going to make you feel any better."

"Too late for that," you mutter under your breath.

"Come again?"

"Nothing. Just tell me."

"...Fine." Hayner takes a deep breath, like he's about to tell you some tragic news. C'mon, how bad could it possibly be? With Yuffie and Aerith, it's probably something really petty.

"...Yuffie and Aerith were talking to Mackenzie this morning, and apparently she's seeing someone now."

"Seeing someone? As in, she's-"

"She's dating someone, yeah."

"..." You don't bother replying; you're sure your emotions are written all over your face.

"Told you so, man," Hayner says quietly after a few moments. "I knew you'd be pissed."

"No...well, yeah, I am. But thanks for telling me. At least you have the guts to."

Hayner hums a low note under his breath. You know what he's thinking, and you agree: Yuffie and Aerith being secretive about it is not helping anyone.

"Who?" you ask suddenly.

"Huh?"

"Who is she dating?"

Hayner shrugs. "Dunno. I really don't know that much about it." He chuckles. "Actually, I overheard them talking about it...they don't know that I know. And we're gonna keep it that way."

You smirk, but the happiness quickly fades.

Kenzie has moved on, but you can't. Why do you always do this...? It's just like what happened with Namine.

"You shouldn't be upset," Hayner tells you.

_Yes, I should_, you think.

"Besides...shouldn't you try the same thing? Maybe it would be good for you."

No, there's no denying that. You'll admit that this...obsession with Kenzie is bad for your health. And you would let go, except for one little problem: you still love her.

So there's no letting go just yet. For now, you'll have to wait it out.

But this whole thing brings up another issue: Yuffie and Aerith. You'd bet munny that they encouraged her to go on this date. And yet they tell you all the time that they "understand." Whose side are they on, anyway? Time to find out.

Suddenly the day just got more interesting.

You find Yuffie and Aerith in one of the cleared-out rooms, cleaning up and setting out fresh equipment and supplies for the next possible patient.

"Hey," you say, standing in the doorway. They both jump, then wheel around to look at you.

"Hey," they reply in unison, immediately breaking eye contact.

You frown, then walk into the room, closing the door behind you.

"I have a few questions for you guys," you begin.

"Shoot," Yuffie says, and Aerith gives her a look that says, "You're a huge idiot, you know?"

"Is it true? Is Kenzie really dating someone now?" you ask. They both freeze; Yuffie drops the tray of dirty tools she was holding, and they clatter to the floor.

"How did you find out?" Aerith asks.

"Does it matter? But I'm right, aren't I?"

"...Yeah," Yuffie replies, not looking at you.

"Why did you try to hide it from me?" You laugh. "Did you really think it would work?"

"Yes," Yuffie says. She gets another look from Aerith. "Well...we know you're still getting over the whole incident, but Mackenzie isn't. Shouldn't it be okay for her to move on if she's ready? Or does she have to sit around while you sort out your depression?"

"I never said that," you say angrily. "But it sounds like you encouraged her to do this?"

They don't answer you; they don't even _look _at you.

"So you did. I don't understand you guys at all."

"What makes you say that?" Aerith asks, finally looking at you.

"Whose side are you on? One minute you say that it's okay for me to still be upset and to still love her, but you turn around and take her away!"

"We didn't take her away!" Yuffie exclaims. "She decided it on her own accord."

"With _your_ help!" You sigh, frustrated. "I know you guys... I know you _way_ better than Kenzie knows you. And I know that you definitely had something to do with this."

"So what if we did?" Aerith snaps. "Who are you to say what's right or wrong?"

"I'm not anybody, but I'm damn sure I know a lot more about this whole thing than you two bitches do!"

Aerith and Yuffie give you such icy glares that you could swear the room grows colder.

"...Forget it."

Storming out of the room, you feel your hands clench into fists. This is the most ridiculous thing you've ever been involved in. Forget Axel and the Organization-his sister is causing the next keyblade war.

But there's nothing you can do. Once again, all you can do is wait this mess out and hope for the best. Or even just _something_ good.


	9. Chapter 8: A Guarded Heart

Chapter 8: A Guarded Heart (youtube = watch?v=H4QDkRRxei4)

Memo: Mmmm... Eri Nobuchika is amazing. If you've never listened to her before, I feel sorry for you. She is an amazing musician. If Kenzie were Japanese, that's who she would be. lol Anyway, no Roxas this time around, just Kenzie. :3 Enjoy and thanks much for reading~

five months later

your pov

"It's two o'clock..." you mutter to yourself, checking your cell phone for the time. Sighing heavily, you thrust your hands into your jacket pockets. "You should be here by now..."

It's nearing the end of October, and the weather certainly is beginning to show it. The crisp, cool air is a nice change from the summer heat, and whenever you're outside at night, you can see your breath. You happen to love this time of year, even more than summer.

"Sorry I'm late."

You smile up at Riku, who blushes a little, embarrassed.

"It's okay," you reply, snapping your cell phone shut and putting it in your back pocket. "But I was getting kind of worried. What took you so long?"

"There was an accident as I was walking here, so I had to take the long way."

"An accident?"

Riku frowns. "Someone crashed their car into a pole. From what I overheard, it sounded like maybe it was on purpose."

"Did the person live?"

"I dunno. But it's sad, isn't it?"

"Yeah..."

These have been some rough times here in Hollow Bastion. The economy is slowing down again, and some people are losing their jobs. You can remember before when this happened-people were very upset and some were even suicidal. That's probably the case for whoever crashed his car.

"...Let's do something fun now," Riku says, smiling. You nod, smiling back.

_At least we have each other_, you think, taking his hand, and the two of you begin to amble through the park. This is one of your favorite things to do on your days off, especially when it's cool outside like this. That's one more thing you and Riku have in common-you both love cool weather.

"Do you want any hot chocolate or anything?" Riku offers as the two of you pass a stand.

"I'm okay, thanks," you reply, smiling. "Do you feel like people-watching today?"

"Nah... I can't seem to sit still today."

"Me either."

You walk a little farther on in silence, but it's not an awkward silence or anything. You get such a calm feeling from moments like this, where the two of you can be together in peace.

Since the two of you met, there was a lot secrecy-not really between the two of you, but between Yuffie and Aerith and all of your other friends who couldn't know. And they still don't, but it's becoming easier to hide it.

"Wanna walk off the path?" Riku asks you.

"Sure," you say, grinning. You never know who or what you might find off the beaten path. Riku is proof of that.

"So, what were we talking about last time we were here?" he says.

"Ummm...you were telling me about your other friends on Destiny Islands."

"Oh, yeah, that's right." He smirks. "You know, you would enjoy it there."

"You think so?"

"Yeah. I mean, the weather is totally different, so you might not like that, but it's beautiful there, and my other friends are pretty fun. ...I could take you there, if you wanted to visit."

You pause, thinking about this.

"...Let me think about it," you reply.

Truly, you would like to go. But what would you tell everyone? And what if someone needed you back here?

Suddenly, as the two of you walk through the quiet trees, you see someone that looks very familiar off in the distance.

"Uh-oh," you whisper, stopping dead in your tracks.

"What is it?" Riku murmurs.

"I think...Yuffie might be ahead of us," you reply, your heart pounding.

You watch the girl carefully. She has the same build as Yuffie, and though you can't hear her voice, her body language seems very similar. There's a chance it may not be her after all, but there's still a chance that it _is_ her, and it's not worth the risk.

"We should turn around and go the other way," you declare, pulling Riku along.

"Okay," he mumbles.

You really wish things could be different regarding Yuffie and Aerith and all of your other friends. If they could just know everything, things would be SO much easier. But instead, everyone is hiding in their own little bubble of secrecy, and you have to keep thing hidden carefully, and you can't ask questions too openly, or somebody's bubble might pop.

_Roxas started all of this_, you think angrily. _So shouldn't he be the one to clean up this mess? Why do we have to suffer for something he and Namine did_? _Can't he just tell them_?

You begin to imagine what would happen if Roxas told everyone the truth-that Sora and Kairi were dead, that he and Namine murdered them, and that Riku loved Namine, too.

You aren't exactly sure how close Yuffie and Aerith were to Kairi, but you know they love Sora like he was their little brother, and you're sure that the news of his death would come as a shock.

Yuffie would probably be the most upset, simply because she's high-strung to begin with. Who knows how badly she would freak out. In fact, you could see her becoming violent, maybe even attacking Roxas. Not that he wouldn't deserve to some extent, but he's hiding his sins for good reason.

Aerith would be really upset, too, but she'd definitely show it more in words. Or she might give him that evil, awful silent stare she gives people sometimes if they really piss her off. That'd be enough to give anyone nightmares.

Wait...why do _you_ care about what happens to Roxas? If he would only come clean, life would be so much easier for you! You don't understand yourself sometimes. How can ninety-nine percent of you hate him with every fiber of your being and yet one percent still cares?

_I should not have to care about him anymore_, you tell yourself. _Even though he may have loved me, even if he did nice things for me, he broke my trust. I don't want to even think about him anymore! I want to forget about him_! _I want to forget he even exists_!

"Mackenzie?"

You look up at Riku, who is looking at you with an expression of concern on his face.

"You just randomly stopped walking," he says. "Are you okay?"

"..."

_I want to forget about Roxas and move on to someone who I know loves me and cares about me too much to lie to me_, you realize as you look at Riku's honest aqua eyes. _And if I won't forget on my own, I'll make myself forget_.

Without warning, you practically throw yourself into Riku's arms, embracing him tightly. Mustering up a little bit of courage and a little bit more deviance, you plant a kiss right on Riku's lips. He doesn't pull away until you do.

It's funny...you have to stand on your tip-toes to reach him.

When you finally look at Riku again, he places his free hand on your forehead.

"Are you sure you're feeling okay?" he teases. "That came out of nowhere."

"Sorry," you breath, trying not to laugh. "It feels like I've been waiting for forever to do that."

"Forever is a long time," Riku points out. "If you really have been waiting that long, then you should do it again."

You can't hold back the laughter anymore, especially after _that_ comment.

"Okay," you agree, kissing him again.

A strange feeling begins to overwhelm you; it's almost like you want to cry out, for no real reason. But it's not a bad feeling.

You try to remember another time you felt like this, but you can't. Shouldn't you be able to?

"You know," you say a few minutes later, "I think I would like to visit your old home."

Riku smiles. "You'll love it."

"But...aren't _you_ afraid to go back? I mean, your best friends did die there."

"...Yeah, I wouldn't say I'm not afraid. But I can't keep running from those memories. They'll always be there, but they won't be something I have to think about all the time."

"I know what you mean," you murmur. When you had to go back to a normal life after your abduction, you had to surpress those memories somewhat.

"...Do you want to go?"

"Yeah." You smile. "What are we doing for dinner?"

"You're always hungry."

"That's a place to eat?"

Riku smirks, and you smirk back.

"Fine. Let's go."

_I like making new memories_, you decide as you and Riku walk toward the park's exit. _I don't need the old ones anymore_.


	10. Chapter 9: If Only

Chapter 9: If Only ( youtube = watch?v=ZVTiG6-cLtU)

Memo: Wow! So I can't believe I've gotten to this part already! Haha, I was sitting here writing, and then I looked at my chapter layout, and I said, "WHOA! This scene already! That went by _fast_!" Hope you enjoy it! :D (PS: No Kenzie, just Roxas. PPS: It's five months after the last time we met with Roxas (chapter 7), not five months after the events of the previous chapter (chapter 8). But it IS after the events in chapter 8, by a few days.)

five months later

roxas' pov

"Good morning, Emi," you say, walking into the familiar room. Emi appears to have just woken up.

"...Is it just me or do you get me up earlier every time you come in here?" she grumbles, pulling the sheets up over her head.

"It's just you. I come in at the same time every time," you assure her. She mutters something that you can't hear, so you ignore her. "How are you today?"

"How do you always manage to be so polite?" she asks, peering out from under the blankets. Her brown eyes search yours.

"The same way you manage to be immature-lots of discipline and practice," you reply. She huffs a sigh of defeat.

"Fair enough. So, what do have to say to me today?"

"Answer my question, first. How are you?"

Emi pauses, thinking this over. "I guess I'm okay. I'll feel better when I can see Carly."

You don't say anything at first. To be honest, you're a little surprised Emi has become so attached to her daughter.

"Are you still considering giving Carly up for adoption?"

"I knew you were going to ask me that," Emi growls. "And yes, I am. Does that make you feel better?"

"..."

"...Sorry. I don't mean to sound harsh. I know you've been having a rough time lately, too."

You raise an eyebrow at Emi, and she does it right back.

"What do you mean by-"

Suddenly the door across the room opens, and Yuffie walks in holding Carly, Emi's three-month-old daughter.

"Hello, my darling," Emi says, sitting upright and taking Carly into her arms.

Yuffie says nothing to either of you. She hasn't talked to you directly ever since you called her and Aerith bitches, and neither has Aerith. In fact, it seems like you've been losing your friends slowly but surely since then. When Leon and Cloud found out about the fight, they-obviously-took the girls' side, and so now they're avoiding you, too. Cid suggested that you try to apologize, and when you refused to-because you _aren't_ sorry-he blew up at you.

So right now you've got Pence, Olette, and Hayner to talk to, and your patients. And who knows how much longer any of it will last. The stress might kill you first.

"_That's_ what I mean," Emi says suddenly, tearing you out of your thoughts. "Yuffie doesn't talk to you anymore; don't think I haven't noticed. And neither does Aerith, or Leon, or Cloud, or that old fat-ass."

"Cid?" you offer

"Yeah, that's the one. They don't talk to you anymore, and I don't understand why."

"..." You don't respond. It's none of her business, anyway.

"Does it have to do with that little girl who left you?" Emi asks, breaking the silence. You sigh. "Yeah, I can tell by that sigh that it does. What happened?"

"...Let's just say...she's having a much easier time moving on than I am," you explain. "Yuffie and Aerith and I got into an argument about it, and now...well, everything is messed up."

"Tell me about it," Emi says with a small sigh. "You know, Roxas, life never goes how you want it to, so you might as well be thankful you still exist, because some people don't even have that."

Ugh...that was the exact opposite thing you needed to hear.

Thankfully, the door opens again, and this time Hayner walks in.

"Hey, Roxas, if you're done, can I talk to you for a minute?" he asks, smiling at you and Emi.

"Yeah, I'll be out in just a minute," you assure him, smiling back. You're lucky you still have him, at least. Despite the fact that sometimes he's tactless, he's a good friend.

"Well, I'll talk to you later, then," you tell Emi, who is gently playing with the soft tufts of brown hair on Carly's head.

"Okay, Roxas. Good luck."

Good luck? What's that supposed to mean?

Instead of replying, you simply smile, and to your surprise, Emi smiles back, unusually genuine.

"What's up?" you ask Hayner when you enter your office. He's sitting in a chair across from your small desk, like he's here on some sort of business meeting. But you know him better than that, and therefore you know that he's just sitting there waiting for you.

Closing the door behind you, you go ahead and sit down in your chair.

"Roxas, do you know what this is?" Hayner asks, holding out something to you. You figure it's some mysterious object from the scene of a crime or something, but all it is is a clock.

"Uh, a clock?" you reply, raising an eyebrow. He nods as you take it out of his hands.

"And what do clocks keep track of?"

"Time?" What's his point?

"Roxas, what are you running out of?"

"...If this is an attempt to make me laugh, it's having the opposite effect," you mutter.

"It's not. I'm being dead serious right now." Hayner leans over the desk, looking you straight in the eye. "I'm telling you this because you're my best friend, and I can tell you're miserable. You need to let her go."

"Hayner..."

"C'mon, man! She's not coming back!" Hayner throws his hands up in the air. "It's just like with Namine! She's not coming back! Move on already!"

"Hayner, trust me," you interrupt. "If it were that easy, I would've already done it months ago. But it's not as simple as everyone assumes."

"Why? See, that's the other thing. Both you and Mackenzie are keeping us in the dark about why you guys split in the first place. Maybe if you told us-"

"It was a mistake to tell her in the first place, so there's no way I'm telling you, or anyone else."

"Ah ha ha," Hayner says, smirking at you. You feel like a little kid being interrogated for something stupid. "So it's not about _her_ secrets. It's about _yours_."

"...I won't deny that," you reply, holding your head high.

"Well, what did you tell her that freaked her out so badly that she left?"

"Something I'm never going to repeat."

"Hah. You fell right into that trap, man." You give Hayner a puzzled look. "You just _confirmed_ that a secret of yours is, in fact, why Mackenzie left. So now all you need to do is-"

"Hayner, you think I'm just being stubborn, but I'm not." You sigh, frustrated. "This is what I'm going to tell you, and this is _all_ I'm going to tell you: I am not who you think I am. Namine and Riku were the only people who knew that for a long time, until Kenzie came around. After Namine died, I thought maybe I would be able to trust her with my secrets, so I told her. I wish I wouldn't have, because now we wouldn't be in this mess.

"I don't care how much you decide to antagonize me, because I'm never going to tell you or anyone else what I did-I'm never going to make that mistake again. But leave Kenzie alone. She didn't do anything wrong; she was just curious like you guys are now. I don't blame her for leaving-I blame myself. And that's why it's a lot harder for me to get over this than it is for her."

The room falls silent; the air is thick with your words, and it almost feels like it's getting warmer because of it.

"...I have to say, man," Hayner says at last in a low voice, "I'm...really disappointed in you. All this time, I've really looked up to you. I've always seen you as someone stronger than who you really are."

"I'm not strong at all," you state honestly.

"I can see that now."

It's silent again. A few minutes pass by like that before Hayner continues.

"I'm not going to be like the others and not talk to you, but until you can be honest with me, I'm not so sure I should keep you as such a close friend."

"Then we might as well say goodbye," you say quietly.

Hayner sighs. "You're really never going to tell me, are you?"

"No," you reply.

"...I don't understand you."

"Yeah, well, nobody really does except one person, and like you said, she's not coming back."

"But why-"

"Hayner, do you trust me?" you ask suddenly, leaning across the desk to look at him. This is such an important question, and you can tell he gets it.

"...I don't know anymore," he answers, shaking his head. He thinks for a moment, then replies, "I guess I still do, yeah."

"Then listen to me very carefully: if anyone else, and I mean ANYONE else, found out about what just Kenzie and I know, I would die. I would be killed. So consider my secrecy as a fight for my life."

Hayner remains quiet, as you would expect him to after hearing such a testimony.

"...Okay." Hayner finally nods. "I still don't completely agree with you, but I guess I understand now more than I did."

"Thanks for that," you say, smiling. "You have no idea how much I really needed to hear that."

"Should I say anything to Yuffie or Aerith or-"

"No, don't worry about them." You frown a little. "As long as they're going to be secretive with me, I'll be secretive with them."

"...It's too bad it has to be this way," Hayner murmurs. You sigh, letting out a tired laugh.

"Trust me, Hayner. You don't even know the half of it."

hayner's pov

"So you talked to that jerk, huh?" Yuffie says, sneering as she sorts equipment.

"I did, actually," you reply, frowning at her attitude. "I think you guys need to apologize to Roxas and start this whole thing over."

"Oh yeah? And what makes you say that?"

"Well, I can't say too much about it, but I will say this: the reason Mackenzie left has nothing to do with her and everything to do with _him_."

"What a surprise."

"Yuffie, something in his past is coming back to haunt him now, and you're not helping things any," you snap, surprised at how mean you just sounded. Yuffie pauses.

"Hayner..."

"No, you don't understand what I'm saying. He needs us now more than ever, because he's to blame and he knows it. It's just...the way he's handling this is stupid. He's beating himself up over it so badly that we don't need to help, trust me."

Yuffie doesn't respond, so you continue.

"Last time I checked, he's still our friend. He has a good heart. I mean, for Pete's sake, he started this hospital, didn't he? And even after we found Namine, he kept it going. He's _still_ going. The guy never gets a break! And while I don't necessarily feel sorry for him, I think it's stupid that we're adding more stress onto his life than he needs. Does that make sense?"

"...Hayner, there's nothing wrong with you and him staying close," Yuffie begins. "But I have Mackenzie's happiness to worry about, too. Roxas is a big boy-he can take care of himself. Mackenzie needs me and Aerith right now...now more than she ever has. The other day, I asked her a question about Roxas, and she acted like she'd never heard of him before. It's like she's trying to surpress her memories of him or something." Yuffie sighs, looking genuinely hurt. "So while I agree that life would be easier if Mackenzie and Roxas got back together, I also understand that it's not going to happen. You and Pence and Olette can take care of Roxas. I need to be there for Mackenzie."

"Last time I checked, we were all friends with each other," you say, sighing. "There were no sides. But whatever. Things are so messed up right now that it doesn't even matter anymore. But fine. If that's how you all want it to be, then fine."

You take one last look at Yuffie before you walk away. If you didn't know better, you'd say she had tears in her eyes.


	11. Chapter 10: Let's Be Us

Chapter 10: Let's Be Us (youtube = watch?v=Lt5GGrY-iT4)

Memo: So...if you like Jesse McCartney, you should look up his song "Oxygen" on youtube and watch all the live performances where he serenades a girl. It makes me so jealous. X3 Anywho, hope you enjoy this chapter. This is just Kenzie...and Riku, of course. :3

your pov

"Wow...this place is huge," you murmur as Riku leads you through the aisles of the gummi ship rental store. You've never been inside of it before, and it turns out that the inside is a lot bigger than what appearances let on.

"The outside of the store doesn't do the inside justice," Riku agrees, turning down an aisle. You quickly follow, hanging on to his sleeve so you don't get lost. "So you've never ridden in a gummi ship before?"

"No," you reply. "I've never driven a car before, either."

"_That_ I can relate to."

You watch in silence as Riku pushes a few buttons on a screen that displays different types of ships.

"But I can't believe you've never been outside of this world before," he continues, pulling you another direction.

"You might call me sheltered," you say, laughing.

"I will."

Riku smirks at you, and you match it. He's being mean, but in the nice way, if that makes any sense. ...It's amazing how well you've come to understand him in these past few months. What would you do without him?

It's exciting that you're going to where he used to live, but it's also a little bit terrifying. You're mostly afraid of _his_ reaction. After all, his memories of his old friends were made on these islands.

"You know, I crashed my ship when I came here," he says suddenly. You immediately tense up.

"What," you snap. You didn't think you could be more nervous, but obviously you can.

"I did it on purpose, don't worry." Too late for that.

"But...why would you do that?" you ask. "Aren't these things kind of expensive?"

"...I didn't ever want to go anywhere else. I didn't want to tempt myself with going back to my home." Riku laughs, probably at the worried expression on your face. "Don't worry. I've driven a ship since then."

"Where did you go if you didn't go home?" you ask, skeptical.

"I do have friends in other worlds, you know," he tells you. You raise an eyebrow at him. "I've been to Disney Castle a few times since I got here."

"...Disney Castle?" you repeat. "Never heard of it."

"Good grief, you really are sheltered, aren't you?" Riku sighs, continuing to walk toward another part of the building. It looks like where you'll board the ship he ordered. "I have a few friends there. One of them is a King. He's always helped me out."

"A King? Geez, what did you do as a teenager? Were you a prince or a knight or something?"

"...I'll tell you about it when we get home." Riku shakes his head quickly. "My home," he corrects himself.

"..." You didn't really like the tone of his voice just then. He sounded like his past was something he'd rather not discuss. But you were honest about your past, so he has to be honest about his...and you think he knows it, too.

"...Mackenzie?"

Just a few hours later, you feel Riku shaking your shoulder gently. You must've fallen asleep while he was flying. The good news is that you're still alive, so Riku didn't crash.

"We're here," he says as you sit upright. "...You might want to change into something...lighter."

You realize you're still wearing your jacket and gloves. It was getting cold back in Hollow Bastion, but you can tell by the way the sun is pouring in that Destiny Islands won't be a frozen wasteland. Though that'd be kind of neat if it was...

"Where are we going to sleep?" you ask Riku as you slip off your jacket. It falls to the floor, your gloves following suit. "Here?"

"Probably, unless somebody offers up their house," Riku answers, shrugging a little. "...How do you feel about visiting my parents while we're here?"

"I'm okay with that if you are."

Riku doesn't respond. You can tell he definitely has mixed emotions about this whole thing.

"There's no use running from it," he finally decides. "But I'll save it for tomorrow. C'mon, let's go."

He holds out his hand to you, and you bounce over to him, taking it and walking with him out of the gummi ship. Your feet hit the sand, and you laugh, startled.

"You're wearing shoes?" Riku asks you, laughing at you. You shrug, blushing.

"I forgot it was a beach," you admit, kicking off your tennis shoes and throwing them back on the ship. Turning around, you take in your first good look of Destiny Islands.

As much as you hate judging off of first impressions, you hope that _this_ impression is right. To say the least, it's beautiful. You can see a little waterfall and a tiny pool. There's a small little wooden shack that's built into the rock formations of the island. A huge bridge connects a tiny island onto this bigger island. And there are palm trees everywhere.

"...This is...the prettiest place I've ever seen," you gasp, eyes wide.

"I can't take that as too much of a compliment, considering the only other place you've been is Hollow Bastion," Riku teases. You pout, letting go of his hand so you can explore. "Hey! Where are you going? Come back-I didn't mean to make you mad!"

You just laugh and trot along, heading toward the shack first. There's virtually nothing inside, just a window and a staircase, which you follow up and out to a higher part of the island. The bridge is now right in front of you.

"Mackenzie!" you hear Riku shout. "If you get hurt, you're going to be in so much trouble!"

"Come catch me!" you tease him, running out onto the bridge. You hear him growl, which makes you laugh again. In no time flat you reach the little island.

"It's so pretty here," you breath, smiling brightly.

"I'll say!"

"Whaaa!" you scream as a boy about your age pops out from behind a tree.

"Hey, hey! Don't be scared!" he says, waving his hands around. "I'm a friend of Riku's! The name's Tidus!"

You fall silent as you look him over. He looks nice enough, and he definitely lives here, what with the golden brown skin and the floppy sun-kissed dirty blonde hair. His sky-blue eyes are smiling more than he is.

"Hey, long time no see!" Tidus cries as Riku approaches the two of you.

"Hey, Tidus," Riku says, smiling. "How have you been?"

"Pretty good. Same as usual." He shrugs. "Have you seen Selphie or Wakka yet? They're somewhere around here..."

"What were you up to?" Riku asks, glancing at you.

Tidus grins so brightly that it's almost blinding. "Playing hide and seek."

Riku lets out a sigh as you bust out laughing.

"How old are you?" you ask, guessing him to be around fifteen.

"Seventeen," Tidus replies proudly.

"And you still play hide and seek!" you gasp. "You guys are amazing! Can I meet the other two?"

Tidus laughs, nodding. "Sure! Come on, let's go find them!"

It's official: this is the coolest place in the universe.

"Follow me, if you think you can keep up!" Tidus looks at Riku, a challenge written all over his face.

"I would, but she'll get lost," Riku says, jabbing a thumb at you.

"Awww, she looks like she could keep up, am I right?" Tidus approaches you, grinning again. You notice flecks of hazel in his eyes.

"You bet!" you assure him, only wanting to see them race. It works.

"Okay, fine, you're on," Riku says, smirking.

"Wow, Riku, you're out of shape!" Tidus laughs as you and said blonde walk out onto a wooden platform. You see a girl with light brown hair jumping rope. She stops when she sees you.

"Ooo, who are you?" she asks, dropping the rope and bouncing over to you. Her voice is very high-pitched, but she looks about your age. "Did you fall from the sky, too?"

"Um?" You look at Tidus, who laughs, shaking his head.

"She came with _Riku_," he answers for you. Selphie lets out a shriek so high-pitched that you're pretty sure dogs back in Hollow Bastion just started barking.

"Riku's here?" she gasps, her hair bouncing with her body.

"He's catching up," you reply. "Hi, by the way. I'm Mackenzie."

"Hi! I'm Selphie! Nice to meet you!" She reminds you a bit of Yuffie.

Suddenly Riku appears, gasping for breath.

"Damn," he says, laughing as he pants. "I feel so old."

"You _are_ old!" Selphie cheers, running over to him and giving him a hug. "How are you?"

"Tired," he replies, still laughing. You grin at him.

"You haven't changed a bit!" Selphie smile fades, and she puts her hands on her hips. "But why did it take so long to come back here?"

"...I had to have the right person inspire me," he answers, glancing at you. You feel yourself blush.

"Ohhhh." Selphie grins. "I see. Well, you wanna go find Wakka? I'm sure he's around here-"

"HALLOOOOO!"

You all turn to see a tall young man run in behind Riku. He has bright orange hair in a style you've never seen before. He must be Wakka.

"You rang~?" he says, his voice thick with a strange accent.

"Look who's back, Wakka!" Tidus exclaims, pointing at Riku.

"Riku! Riku! Mah mon, Riku!" Wakka laughs as he walks over to Riku, clapping him on the back. "How've you been, mon?

"Okay," Riku says, smirking. "How about you, Wakka? You haven't changed one bit, have you?"

"Nevah!" he answers, letting out a loud laugh. He then sees you. "And who's the pretty little girl? Did you bring 'er?"

"I'm Mackenzie," you reply, smiling. Wakka looks the oldest of the three. He's probably Riku's age.

"This calls for celebration!" Wakka shouts.

"Cookout?" Riku murmurs, looking at Selphie.

"Cookout!" Tidus replies, pumping his fist into the air.

Yes...this place is amazing. What have you been missing all your life?

the next day

riku's pov

You wake up earlier than anyone else, just out of habit, like you knew you would. Sitting upright, you dust the sand off of your arms and look around at your friends. They all mean a lot to you, but it's just not the same without Sora and Kairi. You can still hear their voices clearly, like you just saw them yesterday.

Standing, you look at Mackenzie, who is sound asleep next to Selphie. She seems to be really enjoying herself...good. You're glad you could give her this experience. Too bad it's under better circumstances.

You know what you have to do now, so you walk away, back toward the treehouse, where it all started.

The place looks the same as it did the day you left. There are still bloodstains in the wood; those will probably never go away. Sighing, you lean against the wall, where you used to always sit when the three of you went up here. Closing your eyes, you hear their voices, clear as day, like they're really there. They're laughing...probably because they're together again. Not in the way any of you expected, but together nevertheless.

"Riku?"

You turn your head to see Mackenzie standing in the entryway, looking at you.

"Are you okay?" she asks, walking in and sitting down next to you.

"Yeah," you murmur. "This is..."

"I know," she says, closing her eyes. "...It's so peaceful here. At least they died somewhere beautiful."

"...But what good does that do them?" you say, sighing.

"Well...maybe they're someplace beautiful now because of it," she explains. "Because that's their last memory together. ...Does that make sense?"

...You knew there was a good reason you love Mackenzie.

"...Here, come on, Mackenzie, I'll show you where they were buried," you say, standing and pulling Mackenzie up next to you.

"You know, you don't have to call me 'Mackenzie' all the time," she says, smiling.

"Then what should I call you?" you ask, smirking.

"'Kenzie.'"

"See?" You motion to the little plots of dirt in front of you. "They'll always be here. That's why I had to leave. ...It hurt too much to stay with them."

"...I understand," Kenzie says, frowning. "But I don't think I would complain if I had to stay here forever. It's beautiful, and your other friends are amazing."

"Haha, yeah...they're a special bunch," you murmur, chuckling quietly.

"If you ever did decide to come back, would you take me with you?" she suddenly asks.

"What? Why?"

She shrugs, grinning. "Because I love it here. I seriously want to stay here forever."

You smile. "Maybe someday, then."

a few days later

your pov

"Ugh," you groan, frowning. "Today is our last day here. Can't we stay a little longer?"

"No, you have work, remember?" Riku reminds you. You shrug.

"I'll quit," you say, smiling. You'd give anything to spend a lifetime like this, sitting here on the end of this dock, swinging your bare feet like a little kid. Who'd want to leave? ...Riku would.

"Don't quit your job because of me," Riku laughs. You laugh, too.

"It's not because of you-it's because of this place." You pause. "...And, yeah, because of you, too..."

Riku smirks at you, then kisses you on the cheek. You smile.

"...I think I have this thing for red-heads," Riku suddenly admits, making you laugh out loud.

"So if I dyed my hair..."

"You wouldn't. I know you wouldn't."

"I dunno, because you just said that-"

Riku kisses you to stop your protest. Hmm...maybe you should go on little rants more often.

"...I want ice cream," you say suddenly. Riku laughs quietly. "Hah, hey, do you remember that time last year when you bought me ice cream in winter? It was so cold outside, but you did it anyway."

"...What?"

You frown, looking Riku in the eye. "Don't you remember?" That memory is so vivid...you'll never forget it.

"...Kenzie, I didn't even _know_ you last winter," Riku says, frowning.

"What...?" You squint your eyes, looking out at the water. "...Then why do I have that memory of you?"

Riku doesn't answer, the frown still on his face. You sigh quietly. When did that happen? You can picture it perfectly.

"...Maybe I was dreaming," you finally decide. "I must've been."

"Knowing you, probably," Riku teases, smiling again.

"...Can't we stay here forever?" you ask. "Do we really have to go back? I love it here."

Riku doesn't answer you. He's obviously still thinking about your previous conversation.

"I want to stay here forever," you repeat.

And, to your surprise, Riku stays silent.


	12. Chapter 11:  Dreams and Nightmares

Chapter 11: Dreams & Nightmares (youtube = watch?v=mZD9NCkHeSM)

Memo: Back at Hollow Bastion now! This has Roxas in it again, too. So...I hope you enjoy it, and if you've ever seen Advent Children-well, there's a part near the end of this chapter that came out of inspiration from that movie. Oh, and note that Riku's past never came up for discussion-on PURPOSE. XD You'll see. X3

Also, what do you think of this so far? I have a lot of views but not many reviews...^^;

Enjoy.

your pov

_Deja vu_, you think as you enter the hospital through the automatic doors. Same as usual. But it's just like the last few times you've come in to talk to Yuffie and Aerith before work-you're even texting the same person.

"You."

You look up, then grin as Aerith runs over to you. She hugs you tightly, and you hug her back, grateful for her kindness.

"Why didn't you call right when you got back?" she asks, pouting as she looks you over.

"I was tired," you admit, shrugging. "Is it such a crime if I wanted to make up the sleep I missed?"

"Sleep you missed, huh?" Aerith raises her eyebrows at you, and you can't help but blush.

"Please don't take that out of context..." you mutter.

"It's my favorite ginger!" you suddenly hear from across the waiting room. Several people turn and look at you, which is nothing unusual. Yuffie tends to draw that reaction out of people.

"Hey, Yuffie," you say as she bounces over to you. She doesn't say anything; she just pulls you into her arms, hugging you with such intensity your arms go numb for a moment.

"How was your getaway?" she asks, grinning. "Are you married yet?"

"What? No," you say, laughing. "It was fun, though. I did meet his parents." That's a safe issue; you can talk about that without revealing too much, and that way your friends can get their fill of gossip for at least one more day.

"You _met _his _parents_?" Yuffie and Aerith cry in unison. More looks.

"Yeah."

"Do you know what that means?" Yuffie giggles quietly. "This guy is _serious _about you."

"I kind of already figured that, but okay," you say. Aerith gives you the suspicious look again. "Oh please, do you really think we went that far that quickly?"

"I think that if you did, you wouldn't tell us anyway," Aerith replies, turning up her nose in frustration.

"Yeah, considering we don't even know his name still," Yuffie adds, pouting at you.

Time to stall.

"I haven't told you his name yet?" you ask, pretending to be surprised about this.

"Nope. And how long have you guys even been seeing each other?"

"Over five months."

"Cute~," Yuffie chirps. "And you guys are together practically every day, aren't you?"

"Yeah..." you murmur, blushing.

"See? I wouldn't be suspicious of you if you didn't keep blushing like that," Aerith says, laughing.

"Haha, sorry." You grin sheepishly. Now would be a good time to leave, while they're distracted. "Hey, I have to get going. I work this morning."

"Hmmm...fine," Yuffie says, not bothering to hide her disappointment.

"Don't think we're so dumb to not know that you're hiding something," Aerith adds as you begin to walk away. "And when we find out, you are in so much trouble."

_I really would be_, you think, smiling at the irony. _They'd be so mad that I hid that I was dating their good friend all this time_. _But they'd get over it_.

roxas' pov

With a small sigh, you turn off your tv and run a hand through your hair. Watching the news before you go to sleep probably isn't the best idea, but it's time consuming. That's all you can ask for at this point.

The last story you saw plays around in your mind for a moment. Two kids were killed today, one was seriously injured-all because of the ice storms you had this past week. Driving in it was a pain; even walking across the parking lot was life or death.

Shuddering, you push the images out of your mind and think of something else less...depressing.

Oh, yeah. Emi.

She finally decided to give Carly up for adoption. It was ultimately the best decision for everyone involved: Carly would have parents that could take care of her properly, and Emi could finally go back home to her parents, who haven't had her home in a long, long time.

That was about the happiest thing that happened today. Everything else was either bad or worse. Yuffie and Aerith still won't talk to you, nor will anyone else besides Hayner, Pence, and Olette-and even they are growing distant. One of your patients died today-he had been in a coma for a few months, and just when you all thought he might pull through, he took a turn for the worse. His heart just couldn't take it; you can relate.

It was a long day.

Sighing one more time, you collapse into bed, placing your cell phone on the nightstand next to your bed. If anyone calls, you probably won't wake up, so you hope no one at work needs you.

There's a bright light right in front of your face. You can feel it. It's warm...like the sun. Are you outside?

Opening your eyes, you find yourself-as you suspected-outside, in a place you've never been before. There are flowers everywhere, though they're not particularly colorful or anything. The air is warm, and it's sunny, but you see no sun. It's just bright.

"...Where am I?" you say out loud, hoping someone will answer. Then you notice something odd. You're standing up. How did this happen? "Hello? Can anyone hear me?"

"Hello, Roxas."

You freeze, not daring to move a muscle. You'd know that voice anywhere. Now you know-you must be dreaming.

"I'm dreaming," you tell her.

"You are," she says. You feel her presense behind you. "But you still came. Even though you're about to break." (quoting from? -name that movie!) You feel her hand touch your arm gently; her hand is warm. "Hm?"

"...Namine," you murmur, frowning.

"So..._why_ did you come?" she asks. You can hear the smile in her voice. It's how you remember her before everything went so wrong. Back when she was happy.

"...I want to be forgiven," you hear yourself say. "...I think...I want forgiveness."

"From who?" she asks.

"...From anyone who will give it to me."

"Oh, Roxas, you know that's not the answer in your heart," Namine says, sounding disappointed.

"I don't even know if I can trust my heart anymore," you admit. "It keeps leading me to places I never wanted to be."

"Like with me?"

You don't dare answer.

"...It's okay, Roxas. I did so many wrong things to you, so it's okay if you're angry. I understand."

"...I just wish...I could start over."

"Roxas..." Namine's hand touches your wrist, even more gently than before. "Please, listen to what I am about to say."

"..." You don't say anything. What's to say?

Well, scratch that. There's plenty you'd like to say to her, but for now, you'll respect her wishes and listen.

"You're doing the right thing. I know it's hard, but...despite what everyone tells you, and what you tell yourself, you're doing the right thing."

"The right thing?" you echo, sighing. "But, Namine, what _is_ the right thing?"

She doesn't answer. Getting frustrated with her ambiguity, you turn around.

Namine isn't there, but two other people are.

"Roxas..." the girl says, grimacing a little. Her red hair moves gently, as though being blown by an invisible wind.

"...K-Kairi..." you gasp.

"Roxas-"

The other person next to Kairi, a boy, steps in front of her, holding out his hand to silence her. He then looks at you, a determined look on his face.

"Sora," you say, standing completely still as he walks toward you.

He makes the same face Kairi made, a sort of grimace, then stops right in front of you.

"You don't want forgiveness from me," he says suddenly. "And you don't need it from me. I know...because you're me."

"But I-"

Sora suddenly reaches out and grabs where your heart is, and everything whites out.

Jumping, you sit upright in bed, wiping the cold sweat from your forehead.

"...What...what was the _point_ of that?" you cry into the empty air. "If you had wanted to help me, you would've left me _alone_!"

Your voice echoes briefly, then everything falls quiet.

Sighing, you fall back into bed again. The last thing you needed was something-or some_one_-to interrupt your precious sleep.

Besides, it was just a dream. Even Namine herself said so.

Inhaling deeply, you close your eyes and try to fall back asleep.

Suddenly you hear the most horrific noise you've ever heard in your life. It sounds like the world is blowing up around you. And then, that blinding white light again.

Startled, you quickly open your eyes. Everything is quiet around you.

You try again, but the same thing happens. Frustrated beyond belief, you get out of bed and grab a book off the shelf, taking it back to bed with you.

Apparently you weren't meant to sleep tonight.


	13. Chapter 12::  PLEASE READ MEMO!

Chapter 12: What are the chances? (youtube = watch?v=HSw18dPo89M)

Memo: *is shaking* UWAAA~ This part is so sad. I realized the other day that I am nothing but cruel to Roxas in my fanfiction works. XD Poor baby. Well, if it makes you feel any better, this will be the last chapter where Roxas and Kenzie will both be in it and be apart! :D hehe. What's the catch, you ask? Well...you'll see. :3

ALSO-the next uploads should come NO LATER THAN Friday.

If you want ANY say in what gets posted next, please follow these instructions:

-contact me (reviews count!) with either the word "fangirl" or "down-to-earth" ...That is all ;)

the next morning

your pov

"The sun doesn't need to be shining," Shasta says to you. "You're bad enough."

"Ha ha. Very funny," you say, still smiling.

Truth is, she's right. Despite the fact that you opened, which meant getting up at five-thirty this morning, you're in the best mood ever. You've never been this happy/excited/wonderful in your whole life. And all because you have a date with Riku. He said it's a surprise, and you aren't expecting a proposal or anything like that. It's just...

Ever since you got back from Destiny Islands, it's like your love for Riku exploded into an obsession. It finally sunk in-you're official. And how lucky you are! Not only is he attractive, but he's a gentleman, too.

"So what's got you in a tizzy?" Shasta continues, careful not to accidentally chop anything besides the raw fish in front of her. "Got a hot date or something?"

"Why, yes, actually. I do." You laugh to yourself, but it comes out as more of a manic giggle. Shasta lets out a snort.

"That was cute, hon. Be sure not to scare him away with that little laugh of yours."

"I won't. We've already been dating for almost six months," you tell her.

"Ohhh, same guy." Shasta shrugs. "I forgot you're one of those goody two-shoes."

"And proud of it."

Shasta smiles at you, then returns to cutting.

"It's just...one would think you'd be tired, considering you and the boss were the first two people here this morning, right?"

"Yeah, that's true. But I'm in such a good mood it's not affecting me."

"You've gotta teach me that skill. I'm gonna need it tomorrow."

You can't help but laugh. "I'm sorry. My shift's over. Maybe another time, 'kay?"

"I'll hold you to it. Get along with yourself, darlin'. Have fun."

"I will. Thanks, Shasta."

Just a few short minutes later, you're out the door, zipping up your jacket over your smelly work uniform. You feel lighter than air, and you can't help but put a rhythmic bounce to your walk. Today has got a good feeling written all over it.

The only thing that doesn't seem to agree is the weather. It's been drizzling off and on all day, and it keeps getting colder as the day goes on. Seems like another icy day on the roads. You're thankful you don't drive, otherwise who knows what danger you'd be in.

Riku doesn't drive, either, and the thought of him safe and sound at home brings a huge smile to your face, despite the strong winds blowing in your face. You can practically feel your snot freezing, but it's okay.

_Oh my gosh_, you suddenly think, gasping quietly. _It's almost Thanksgiving! I wonder...maybe it'd be okay if Riku came with me to Yuffie's? Or even better, if we did something together, just the two of us? Or could we go to the islands again? That would be so much fun_!

An image of Tidus and Wakka running around wildly fills your mind, and you giggle quietly.

_I feel so good today_, you think, still grinning. _I think I'll take the long way home_.

It's going to take you another fifteen minutes to get home now, but so what? That's what cell phones are for! You pull yours out and discover you already have a text from Riku. Smiling brightly, you reply back, your heart flying.

Today is a good, good day.

roxas' pov

It's official: you absolutely hate this weather. Not because it's cold, or even because of the precipitation. It's because people don't know how to drive in it.

Therefore, it takes at least twice as long to drive home, since there are not only incompetent people driving, but there are accidents every day.

So here you are, once again sitting at the light that never turns, sitting in the traffic that never ends. There's not even anything good on the radio. Today you'll just have to settle for people-watching; it's the only way to pass the time.

Nothing is really going on as you sit and inch your way towards home, and nothing really happens until you're finally up to the light, and you'll be the first to go when it turns green.

You hardly believe your eyes for a moment as you watch a young woman about your age walk right past your car, smiling brightly as she texts on her phone. But the bright red hair gives it away.

"...K-Kenzie?" you yell from inside your car. Figures you don't have the top down. Stupid weather! But does that really make a difference? If you said anything at all, what would you say? She would probably just run away screaming if you said anything. It's better to watch her from afar, then.

She looks so incredibly beautiful, like a ray of light in the dark clouds hovering over the city. Who knows what she's smiling about, but who cares? You haven't seen her smile in a year. A year...it's really been that long? Yeah, it really has been. When she left, it was about Thanksgiving time, and right now there's only a week left until that day. But what does that matter? Why are you even thinking about that right now?

"What have I been doing all this time?" you ask yourself, gripping the steering wheel as you watch Kenzie walk away from you and on down the street. She has a bounce in her walk that either you've never noticed before, or she's recently developed. Does it have anything to do with the brilliant smile on her face? Judging by her clothes, she must've just gotten off of work. Maybe that's why she's smiling? But who was she texting? Yuffie? Aerith? Or somebody else?

Suddenly, before you can blink, she turns a corner and disappears. Just like that.

You can feel your heart pounding in your chest, like it wants to escape, just like you want to escape this traffic. Too bad this is the longest light in the district.

Finally, after a few minutes of deep breathing, the light turns green, and you take off. You can't get home any sooner. You've already wasted enough time just sitting around...and you don't mean just the time you sat in traffic. If you're going to do anything about this, now is definitely the proper time.

But by the time you pull into the garage at home, your motivation has significantly dwindled. What exactly were you going to do? It's not like you know where she lives, and the only people who know aren't on speaking terms with you right now. You're just as stuck as you were before.

Oh well. At least you know she's doing okay. She definitely _looked _okay. She looked...grown up. Her eightteenth birthday is soon, isn't it? What you wouldn't give to be there for it...

Sighing, you walk into your house. Your heart is still pounding in shock, but you know you're pretty much out of options.

But you can't ask too much. At least you got to see her smile again. That's enough for now.

_Well, no, it's not_, you realize, sighing again. _But I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I don't know what the "right thing" really is_.

As you set your stuff down on the coffee table in the living room, your cell phone falls out of your arms and onto the floor. You could swear you heard it crack upon landing.

"Ooo," you say, grimacing as it slides under the couch. "Please don't be broken."

Grunting as you squeeze in between the table and your old leather couch, you lay yourself down on the floor to reach your phone. Inhaling sharply, you can hardly believe what's right in front of your eyes.

Your cell phone is there, that's for sure. And it's not broken. But that is now the least of your concerns.

Trapped in the dust and cobwebs you've neglected for a few years are a multitude of puzzle pieces. And not just any puzzle pieces. _The_ puzzle pieces-back from the days Kenzie lived with you.

As if to complete the heart-wrenching discovery, something small and pink is resting there among the dust, too. Pushing back your slight disgust, you reach under to grab it. The cold metal feels familiar on your hand.

It's a key. It's her key.

The image of her departure flashes in your mind, and you let out a choked exhale, part-cough, part-gasp. It's _her_ key-the one she left behind.

_This is a sign_, you realize, your hands shaking so badly that you can barely hold the key, let alone grab your phone. Somehow you manage, though, and you sit up quickly, practically panting.

_Let this be the right thing_, you pray, flipping your phone open and navigating to your speed-dial. _Let me do the right thing_.

Your thumb hesitates before dialing. What are the ups and downs of this?

The downs are obvious: rejection, and she'll tell Yuffie and Aerith, no doubt. Would she go so far as to call a restraining order on you? Somehow you could see it if she totally flipped out.

But the ups are so much better, even though there's actually only one.

If she talks to you, you'll get to talk to her again, even if it's one more time. And if you can fix this, you'll have her back in your life, even if she's not your girlfriend. That's good enough for now, since the power of time can change all of that.

You've made your decision.

Your thumb hits the green "dial" button without further delay.

OH WUT! CLIFFHANGER! ...Yeah, get over it. XD


	14. Chapter 13, Mark I:  READ THE MEMO!

Chapter 13, Mark I: Prisoner Of Love - Read Memo (youtube = watch?v=W6QjKT1A2pI)

Memo: Okay, I have never done anything like this before, so bear with me... This story has two different endings, simply because I couldn't choose between the writer preference in me and the fangirl preference in me. THIS IS NOT A CHOOSE-YOUR-OWN ENDING STORY. They both start out the same, but they end very differently. You can read whichever one you want first-it doesn't matter. This ending is what I call the "writer's preference ending." (If you've already read the other ending, realize now that this one will be MUCH different!) Also note that each ending has its own separate epilogue. Now, please read on, and enjoy.

Note: Even though the beginning parts of each end sound the same, they differ by some details, so please read each ending fully.

your pov

It's only been about twenty minutes since you got home, and your excitement and good mood hasn't faded yet. You didn't take a shower, since you took the long way home and ran out of time, but you still feel good, and you still smell good. Working early means dealing less with fish and more with coffee and baked goods, so you smell like you just came out of an oven yourself.

Smiling into the vanity mirror in front of you, you spritz a little bit of body spray on. Now you smell like a bakery in the middle of a field of flowers. Yes.

Out of sheer impatience, you check your cell phone, which has been sitting on the vanity in silence, for missed calls. Riku is supposed to call you when he's ready for you to go. You're really beginning to get curious about where you're going to be going for this date, and what you'll be doing.

You hope that whatever you may do is indoors-the weather is starting to take a turn for the worse out there. It was an icy walk home; people were sliding everywhere, both walking and driving. The weather people have been saying that this is the worst winter Hollow Bastion has seen in years.

Suddenly you hear your phone buzz, meaning someone is trying to call you.

"_Finally_," you giggle, snatching up your phone and answering it without a second thought.

"Hello?" you say, breathless in excitement.

"Kenzie?" Riku says quietly into the phone.

"Hey, Riku, 'bout time you ca-"

"No...it's _not_ Riku."

Stunned, you hear a click from the other end, and you instinctively pull your phone away from your ear to look at the screen.

It reads, "Roxas Call End: 00:32."

Now all the air in your lungs really has escaped you.

"...Roxas?" you gasp, your jaw dropping and your eyes widening. By chance you look up at your reflection in the mirror, and suddenly you realize what's been going on this whole time.

It was him the whole time-Roxas has always been the person you loved. Riku was simply the replacement when your heart couldn't take the grief of losing him. The only reason you really rejected Roxas was that he didn't live up to the Prince Charming expectation you had made a fancy in your mind. And now you realize-all those memories that you thought you had made with Riku were actually from your times with Roxas; you had just supressed them all until you gave yourself some sort of trance-like amnesia.

"...Oh, God," you whisper, holding your phone tightly in your shaking hands. "What did I just _do_?"

That settles it: you've got to see Roxas. You've got to explain and beg his forgiveness. At least then you'll know...even if he rejects you, at least you'll know.

But first thing's first-you need to call Riku.

In a frenzy, as you pull on shoes and a jacket, you call Riku.

"Kenzie?" he answers. Yeah, see, he was smart and read who the caller was before picking up.

"Riku," you breath, frantically trying to tie your shoes and talk at the same time. "Riku, I-I'm sorry! Something really important just came up and-"

"What? Are you okay?" Riku says, picking up on your anxiety.

"I don't have time-I'm fine, I-I'm sorry!" You pull your jacket closed and grab your keys, heading for the front door. "I'll call you later!"

Without a goodbye, you hang up on him and burst through the front door.

roxas' pov

...What is there left to say or do now...?

Like an arrow has pierced your stolen heart, you sit, frozen, holding your phone in front of your face. Dumbstruck doesn't even begin to cover it. This is worse than rejection; this is straight-up torture and, once again, retribution.

Kenzie thought you were Riku...Riku...of all people, why Riku? Why did it have to be _him_ that she met? You swear on the higher power, if he has done anything to her, even _thought_ about touching her, it'll be his head as a trophy on your wall.

Suddenly standing, you let out a growl and throw your phone to the ground. Who cares if it breaks anymore? What good did that just do you?

You feel like, at any moment, your heart might just stop working. Holding your head in your hands, you let out a fierce yell of sheer hurt. Could this have possibly gotten any more complicated?

Shit, yes it could. If Riku sees Yuffie or Aerith, you'll be exposed. And you'll either go to jail, or Yuffie will strangle you. ...Actually, that doesn't sound like too bad of a deal. Maybe you'll finally stop being hurt.

...No, you can't just give up that easily. You're too angry to think straight. You need to take a walk.

Without bothering to grab your keys or even lock the door behind you, you storm outside into the cold November air, into the crowded afternoon streets of Hollow Bastion.

If you could only go back in time, life would be so much easier. You should've reconciled with Kenzie the second you had a chance-that day she came back to get her stuff, that should've been the end of this whole conflict. You could've prevented all of this from happening. But now she's met Riku, and who knows what's happened on her end.

Your footsteps pound down on the slick pavement in time with the beats of your brain, which are coming in strong, forceful throbs.

Your only hope is that somehow, Kenzie comes to her senses and realizes that you're only human, and that you really do regret what you did. But the only person to tell her that is you, and what are you doing to help things right now? You're stomping around in a fury, all mad at her, when the only person you should be mad at is yourself.

Sighing, you feel the cold air swallow you up at last. You didn't even bother to put a jacket on, you're so upset. But what does it matter? This should be another part of your punishment. After all, you're a murderer.

Gritting your teeth, you walk on, your eyes fixed on the ground just in front of you. You want to hide your shame from anyone and everyone who can see you. Once you feel a little less exceptionally pissed, you'll go back home and try something else. Though who knows where you are now-it feels like you've been walking for forever.

Suddenly, though it sounds distant, you could swear you hear your name being called.

"ROXAS!"

Your head snaps up, and you stop in your tracks. Kenzie is running toward you, appearing from the crowd on the street, and she stops when you see her. You gasp quietly-she looks relieved. Relieved? What for? Because...of you...?

Just as suddenly, you feel yourself go flying somewhere...you're not really sure where.

And then, a horrible noise, a horrible pain, and a bright, white light.

your pov-backtrack

Bursting through your front door, you slam it behind you, causing several people to give you strange looks. You start to run off, then realize you didn't lock your door, so you head back up, then decide it's not important, but then decide it is.

_Does it really MATTER_? you finally tell yourself, running off after a couple moments of indecision.

It's beginning to drizzle, the rain turning into mush as it comes down into the cold air, but you keep running as fast as your legs will carry you. If there weren't people on the street, you'd be able to get to Roxas a lot faster; but you live in Hollow Bastion, and so you have no choice but to be rude.

"Excuse me! Sorry!" you shout, pushing people out of your way rather roughly, squeezing in between couples and jumping over little kids and dogs. You hear people yelling at you from behind, but you keep running. This is so much more important than anything else right now. You've got to get to Roxas. You'll pay for whatever damage you cause later.

Suddenly your feet give out on a slick patch of ice. Screaming, you grab onto the nearest solid object, which happens to be another person. He falls down with you, and-using him as a springboard-you pop back up and run onward.

"Sorry! I'm sorry!" you cry over your shoulder at the man, who looks shocked. You really are sorry, but you have no time to waste. This is truly a race against time.

And, ironically, just as you think you might win the race, time pulls out another trick on you-traffic.

"Oh, come ON!" you shout angrily as you stop at an intersection with a light marked "Do Not Cross."

...Screw it.

Taking your chances, you sprint out into the street. An approaching car has to slam on its brakes for you, but somehow, you make it through and keep on. The driver honks and screams at you, but you barely can hear it. You're only a few blocks from his house.

_But what if he's not there_? you realize, your throat closing up in an effort not to scream. _What if he's somewhere else_? _What if I'm too late_?

Letting out a pathetic whimper, you push yourself harder. If he's not there...

Suddenly, just beyond the swarm of people in front of you, you see a young man with spiky blonde hair. He's walking along, looking at the ground, completely unaware of everything that's around him.

"Roxas!" you say, your voice cracking as you push through more angry people. "Roxas!"

Sure enough, as you make your way toward him, you can see it's clearly him. It seems like you've been running for forever to get to him.

"ROXAS!" you scream at the top of your lungs, elbowing your way into his line of vision. He finally looks up, his blue eyes filled with so many emotions. You can't help but smile, seeing him again. He stares at you for a moment, stopping mid-step, as if in disbelief that you could've come to him.

But you have, and you're here, and now-

Completely interrupting your thoughts, a white pick-up truck comes flying into the intersection, and the front of his car collides with Roxas' body in a blur. You blink, just to make sure it really happened. When your eyes open again, you know it has. The truck is stopped right in front of you, and people around you are screaming and pulling out their phones.

You feel like you can't breathe, and for a moment you wonder if you weren't also hit. But you take a step, and soon you're flying over to Roxas' lifeless body.

"ROXAS!" you scream, dropping to your knees and picking him up in your arms. He's not even wearing a jacket-he might freeze to death before help can come.

"Roxas, stay with me!" you say, placing your hand on his cheek. His eyes flutter, but they don't open. "Don't leave me alone! I'm so sorry I did this to you. But please, you've gotta stay with me! Don't abandon me..."

Finally tears spill over, and each breath you take is a desperate gasp.

Suddenly Roxas' eyes open, and you start to calm down as they move around, obviously disoriented.

"Roxas," you murmur through tears. His eyes make their way up to yours, and the spark that flies in between you makes you want to scream. "Stay with me, Roxas. Don't leave me. I need you."

Roxas doesn't move for a moment, but then you see the sweetest smile cross his lips-one that you've never seen before. He looks truly happy-for once, there was no sadness in his eyes when he smiled. The very sight takes your breath away.

But just as subtly, his smile slowly fades, and his eyes don't blink.

"NO!" you scream, shaking him. "No, please! Stay with me! Stay with me!"

"Mackenzie!"

You whip your head around to see Leon running toward you, along with Cloud, Cid, Hayner, and Pence. They were obviously called, but you bet they never expected to see this.

"What happened?" Hayner says, kneeling down next to you and Roxas, who hasn't moved since his beautiful smile.

You can't answer him-you don't want this to be real.

"Mackenzie!" You hear Yuffie's unmistakable yell, and soon you feel her arms wrap around your neck in a sloppy embrace. "Mackenzie..."

"Mackenzie, we have to take him," Pence says, and you know he's just trying to help, but the thought of being separated from Roxas sends chills through your body.

"NO!" you shout as he, Hayner, and Cloud, gently lift Roxas' lifeless body out of your arms. Now that he's gone, you can clearly see the blood covering you, him, and the ground around you.

"C'mon, Mackenzie," Yuffie says, pulling you to your feet.

"NO! I can't leave him!" you shriek, running toward the ambulance. "ROXAS! ROXAS! I'm so sorry! I still love you! Please, _stay with me_!"

"Mackenzie!"

"Yuffie, I've got to go with him!" you insist, unable to see her face through your tears. "Please, let me go with him..."

She doesn't say anything, but you feel her pull you in the direction of the ambulance, and your heart races as you are pulled up beside Roxas. Immediately you grab his cold hand and press your face into the edge of the bed, tears pouring down your face and onto the steel floor.

later on

still your pov

_Where am I_...? you wonder as your eyes flutter open to see a familiar tiled ceiling. _Oh no. Oh no_.

You quickly sit upright, looking around. You're in the hospital-Roxas' hospital-but where is said blonde? You've got to find him. You've got to know if he's okay.

Throwing the blankets off of you, you jump out of bed and sprint out of the room, bolting down the hallway that leads to the main desk. Olette should be there, and if she is, she's going to tell you where Roxas is. And if she doesn't want to, you'll run around this whole damn place looking for him if you have to.

A nurse's helper squeals as you dart past her, nearly running into her cart of medical supplies. Maybe you should've asked her, but you're not going to waste your time on someone that you don't even know.

Soon you've made it into the front lobby, and you whirl around, looking for Olette. Several people are sitting there, and they give you grim looks, making your heart race.

"Mackenzie!"

Spinning around, you see Aerith approaching you.

"Where is he!" you shout to her.

"Mackenzie-"

"Just tell me! Where is he? Is he here?" Your throat closes up with each question you ask. "ANSWER ME!"

Aerith doesn't answer you, and you let out a low growl, starting to run off again.

"Mackenzie!"

A hand grabs your arm and pulls you into her, hugging you tightly. It's Aerith, and she holds you so close that you know what it must mean.

Letting out a furious shriek, you bury your head into her shoulder, collapsing completely into her arms. He's gone...he's left you. Roxas is dead, and you have no one to blame but yourself.


	15. Epilogue, Mark I: Memorial Address

Epilogue, Mark I: Memorial Address (youtube = watch?v=U4BYDi_Agc0)

Memo: If you've never heard this song before, please listen to it. Please. It has translations on the bottom part of the screen. ...Anyway, thank you so much for reading this. It really means more to me than words can express-and that's saying something, considering usually words are my best form of self-expression. XD Thanks again, and keep reading! -Emi Hikari

six months later

your pov

"Well, Emi, today's the day," you say with a kind smile. Emi smiles back, looking sincerely happy.

"I can go home," she says, sitting down on the bed to tie her shoes.

"You can go home," you reply, nodding.

Neither of you say anything for a while, but you know you're both thinking the same thing: this should've had a slightly different ending. Someone else should've been standing here in your place, but still saying the same things. But this is how it is.

"Do you feel good about the couple who adopted Carly?" you finally ask the brunette.

"Yeah, I actually do. They seem sincere about taking care of her," she answers, her smile wavering a little. "I just wish this had happened to me when I was older. It hurts to give her up."

"I'm sure it does," you murmur, frowning.

"You must understand, right, Mackenzie?" Emi points out. "To not be able to see that person you love ever again."

You give her a sad smile in response. "At least you'll know she's okay."

"Yeah, that's true." Emi grimaces a little. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you sad."

"It's okay. It's not your fault." Mustering up some true bravery, you smile again. "Anyway, your parents will be here to pick you up in the front, so you can head out there anytime you're ready."

"Okay. Thank you."

"You're more than welcome."

Walking out of the room, you glance at your wristwatch. It's almost time for your shift to be up, but you have one more thing you need to do before you can leave.

"Hey, Mackenzie," you hear Olette say from behind the front desk. You smile and return the greeting. But you know the smiles and kindness are just to make you feel better. What no one seems to understand is that you still need a little more time.

"Aerith," you say, entering her office. She looks up from a thick file, taking off her glasses.

"What's up?" she asks in such a casual tone that it makes you want to laugh. You can always count on her to be emotionally honest.

"I'll be leaving soon," you tell her, handing the copy of the keys to your office to her.

"It's that late already?" Aerith huffs a sigh. "I still have so much left to do."

"Make Yuffie help you. She has nothing else to do."

Both you and Aerith laugh, then the room falls silent again.

"Are you going to visit him again?" she asks you after a pause.

"Yeah. I have a picture of Emi to add."

Aerith smiles, and you feel sad again. You feel sad anytime you see a smile, probably because the last thing Roxas did alive was smile.

"I'll see you tomorrow, then?"

"Yeah, in the morning."

Waving, you go back to your office to lock up after yourself and put things away in order to prepare for tomorrow.

After putting away everything you needed to put away, you stop by the plaque on the wall across from your desk. You press your finger to your lips, closing your eyes tightly.

_I will never forget you again_, you promise, placing your fingers on the plaque.

Six months ago, Roxas died in your arms after being hit by a truck. Also six months ago, the hospital-by request of Aerith and the others-was turned over to you, and so now you are in charge. It's been really enjoyable; now you understand why Roxas loved it so much. The plaque on the wall is in memory of Roxas and his services to everyone who passed through. If you look at it, it's like he never left.

But he's gone, and that's life.

But you miss him still, and you know you'll never really get over his death.

But you know he'd want you to be strong, so you will, for him.

Soon you've reached the graveyard back behind the hospital, dedicated to patients who lived and died in this very place. In the very back is Roxas' own little patch of grass, which-thanks to you-has been filled with flowers and now pictures.

"Hey," you murmur, kneeling next to the grave. "It's pretty out today. I might get ice cream later." You smile. "Look, I have pictures for you. Well...just one, actually. Haha. Guess who made it out okay? Emi."

You gently place the picture next to a batch of white roses.

"She went home today," you continue. "And she seemed pretty optimistic. I think she'll do okay. She's strong, because of you." You sigh, still smiling. "You have that effect on people."

Shaking your head, you sigh again, tears threatening to spill over.

"Anyway, same old, same old. Riku's gone back to Destiny Islands. I think that's what was best for him and for me. I don't think I ever really loved him to begin with, you know?

"...I miss you so much. But I know you're watching over me, just like I'm watching over you right now. So...even though we'll never be together again, we can still protect each other. ...I'm sorry I didn't realize that before."

Wiping your eyes, you stand upright once more, breathing deeply.

"So...I'll keep doing your job for you, I guess," you say, giggling through tears. "I miss you. I love you. See you tomorrow."

With one more look at the gravestone, you turn and begin to walk away.

_Tell me this is just a story in a continuing dream_, you pray, tears in your eyes again, _and I just haven't woken up yet_.

END


	16. Chapter 13, Mark II: READ THE MEMO!

Chapter 13, Mark II: Not Your Enemy (youtube = watch?v=eOzRqSKO1mc)

Memo: Okay, I have never done anything like this before, so bear with me... This story has two different endings, simply because I couldn't choose between the writer preference in me and the fangirl preference in me. They both start out the same, but they end very differently. You can read whichever one you want first-it doesn't matter. This ending is what I call the "fangirl's preference ending." It's the longer of the two endings, so sorry for the long read. XD Also note that each ending has its own separate epilogue. Now, please read on, and enjoy.

Note: Even though the beginning parts of each end sound the same, they differ by some details, so please read each ending fully.

your pov

It's only been about twenty minutes since you got home, and your excitement and good mood hasn't faded yet. You didn't take a shower, since you took the long way home and ran out of time, but you still feel good, and you still smell good. Working early means dealing less with fish and more with coffee and baked goods, so you smell like you just came out of an oven yourself.

Smiling into the vanity mirror in front of you, you spritz a little bit of body spray on. Now you smell like a bakery in the middle of a field of flowers. Yes.

Out of sheer impatience, you check your cell phone, which has been sitting on the vanity in silence, for missed calls. Riku is supposed to call you when he's ready for you to go. You're really beginning to get curious about where you're going to be going for this date, and what you'll be doing.

You hope that whatever you may do is indoors-the weather is starting to take a turn for the worse out there. It was an icy walk home; people were sliding everywhere, both walking and driving. The weather people have been saying that this is the worst winter Hollow Bastion has seen in years.

Suddenly you hear your phone buzz, meaning someone is trying to call you.

"_Finally_," you giggle, snatching up your phone and answering it without a second thought.

"Hello?" you say, breathless in excitement.

"Kenzie?" Riku says quietly into the phone. He sounds quieter than usual.

"Hey, Riku, 'bout time you ca-"

"No...it's _not_ Riku."

Stunned, you hear a click from the other end, and you instinctively pull your phone away from your ear to look at the screen.

It reads, "Roxas Call End: 00:32."

Now all the air in your lungs really has escaped you.

"...Roxas?" you gasp, your jaw dropping and your eyes widening. Is this really happening? By chance you look up at your reflection in the mirror, and suddenly you realize what's been going on this whole time.

It was him the whole time-_Roxas_ has always been the person you loved. Riku was simply the replacement when your heart couldn't take the grief of losing him. The only reason you really rejected Roxas was that he didn't live up to the Prince Charming expectation you had made a fancy in your mind. And now you realize-all those memories that you thought you had made with Riku were actually from your times with Roxas; you had just supressed them all until you gave yourself some sort of trance-like amnesia.

"...Oh, God," you whisper, holding your phone tightly in your shaking hands. "What did I just _do_?"

That settles it: you've got to see Roxas. You've got to explain and beg his forgiveness. At least then you'll know...even if he rejects you, at least you'll know.

But first thing's first-you need to call Riku.

In a frenzy, as you pull on shoes and a jacket, you call Riku.

"Kenzie?" he answers. Yeah, see, he was smart and read who the caller was before picking up.

"Riku," you breathe, frantically trying to tie your shoes and talk at the same time. "Riku, I-I'm sorry! Something really important just came up and-"

"What? Are you okay?" Riku says, picking up on your anxiety.

"I don't have time-I'm fine, I-I'm sorry!" You pull your jacket closed and grab your keys, heading for the front door.

Without a goodbye, you hang up on him and burst through the front door.

roxas' pov

...What is there left to say or do now...?

Like an arrow has pierced your stolen heart, you sit, frozen, holding your phone in front of your face. Dumbstruck doesn't even begin to cover it. This is worse than rejection; this is straight-up torture and, once again, retribution.

Kenzie though you were Riku...Riku...of all people, why Riku? Why did it have to be _him_ that she met? You swear on the higher power, if he has done anything to her, even _thought_ about touching her, it'll be his head as a trophy on your wall.

You feel like, at any moment, your heart might just stop working. Holding your head in your hands, you let out a fierce yell of sheer hurt. Could this have possibly gotten any more complicated?

Shit, yes it could. If Riku sees Yuffie or Aerith, you'll be exposed. And you'll either go to jail, or Yuffie will strangle you. ...Actually, that doesn't sound like too bad of a deal. Maybe you'll finally stop being hurt.

...No, you can't just give up that easily. You're too angry to think straight. You need to take a walk.

Without bothering to grab your keys or even lock the door behind you, you storm outside into the cold November air, into the crowded afternoon streets of Hollow Bastion. The only thing you've got to protect you is your phone.

If you could only go back in time, life would be so much easier. You should've reconciled with Kenzie the second you had a chance-that day she came back to get her stuff, that should've been the end of this whole conflict. You could've prevented all of this from happening. But now she's met Riku, and who knows what's happened on her end.

Your footsteps pound down on the slick pavement in time with the beats of your brain, which are coming in strong, forceful throbs.

Your only hope is that somehow, Kenzie comes to her senses and realizes that you're only human, and that you really do regret what you did. But the only person to tell her that is you, and what are you doing to help things right now? You're stomping around in a fury, all mad at her, when the only person you should be mad at is yourself.

Sighing, you feel the cold air swallow you up at last. You still have your jacket on from earlier, and yet the cold is seering through and piercing every inch of your body. It's even started drizzling since you left. But what does it matter? This should be another part of your punishment. After all, you're a murderer.

Gritting your teeth, you walk on, your eyes fixed on the ground just in front of you. You want to hide your shame from anyone and everyone who can see you. Once you feel a little less exceptionally pissed, you'll go back home and try something else. Though who knows where you are now-it feels like you've been walking for forever.

Suddenly, though it sounds distant, you could swear you hear your name being called.

"ROXAS!"

Your head snaps up, and you stop in your tracks. Kenzie is running toward you, appearing from the crowd on the street, and she stops when you see her. You gasp quietly-she looks relieved. Relieved? What for? Because...of you...?

Just as suddenly, you feel yourself go flying somewhere...you're not really sure where.

And then, a horrible noise, a horrible pain, and a bright, white light.

your pov-backtrack

Bursting through your front door, you slam it behind you, causing several people to give you strange looks. You start to run off, then realize you didn't lock your door, so you head back up, then decide it's not important, but then decide it is.

_Does it really MATTER_? you finally tell yourself, running off after a couple moments of indecision.

It's beginning to drizzle, the rain turning into mush as it comes down into the cold air, but you keep running as fast as your legs will carry you. If there weren't people on the street, you'd be able to get to Roxas a lot faster; but you live in Hollow Bastion, and so you have no choice but to be rude.

"Excuse me! Sorry!" you shout, pushing people out of your way rather roughly, squeezing in between couples and jumping over little kids and dogs. You hear people yelling at you from behind, but you keep running. This is so much more important than anything else right now. You've got to get to Roxas. You'll pay for whatever damage you cause later.

Suddenly your feet give out on a slick patch of ice. Screaming, you grab onto the nearest solid object, which happens to be another person. He falls down with you, and-using him as a springboard-you pop back up and run onward.

"Sorry! I'm sorry!" you cry over your shoulder at the man, who looks shocked. You really are sorry, but you have no time to waste. This is truly a race against time.

And, ironically, just as you think you might win the race, time pulls out another trick on you-traffic.

"Oh, come ON!" you shout angrily as you stop at an intersection with a light marked "Do Not Cross." People around you ignore your muttering, thankfully, as you try to find a quick way around this roadblock. But it seems like you'll have to wait.

...Screw it.

Taking your chances, you sprint out into the street. An approaching car has to slam on its brakes for you, but somehow, you make it through and keep on. The driver honks and screams at you, but you barely can hear it. You're only a few blocks from his house.

_But what if he's not there_? you realize, your throat closing up in an effort not to scream. _What if he's somewhere else_? _What if I'm too late_? _Will he even talk to me_?

Letting out a pathetic whimper, you push yourself harder. If he's not there...

Suddenly, just beyond the swarm of people in front of you, you see a young man with spiky blonde hair. He's walking along, looking at the ground, completely unaware of everything that's around him, but you'd know him anywhere.

"Roxas!" you say, your voice cracking as you push through more angry people. "Roxas!"

Sure enough, as you make your way toward him, you can see it's clearly him. It seems like you've been running for forever to get to him.

"ROXAS!" you scream at the top of your lungs, elbowing your way into his line of vision. He finally looks up, his blue eyes filled with so many emotions. You can't help but smile, seeing him again. He stares at you for a moment, stopping mid-step, as if in disbelief that you could've come to him.

But you have, and you're here, and now-

Completely interrupting your thoughts, a white pick-up truck comes flying into the intersection, and the front of his car collides with Roxas' body in a blur. You blink, just to make sure it really happened. When your eyes open again, you know it has. The truck is stopped right in front of you, and people around you are screaming and pulling out their phones.

You feel like you can't breathe, and for a moment you wonder if you weren't also hit. But you take a step, and soon you're flying over to Roxas' broken body.

"ROXAS!" you scream, dropping to your knees and picking him up in your arms. His body is twisted, like he might've broken his back. You shudder at the thought.

"Roxas, stay with me!" you say, placing your hand on his cheek. His eyes flutter, but they don't open. "Don't leave me alone! I'm so sorry I did this to you. But please, you've gotta stay with me! Don't abandon me..."

Finally tears spill over, and each breath you take is a desperate gasp.

"Roxas," you murmur through tears. "I'm so sorry. Stay with me, Roxas. Don't leave me. I need you."

Suddenly Roxas inhales a little, and you sigh with relief. For a moment you thought it might've been too late.

"Roxas, don't give up," you say, stroking his face. You note a bit of blood on your fingertips, and your hand makes its way to a crack in his head. He noticably winces, and you quickly pull your hand away. "Sorry, I'm sorry. Keep fighting. You'll be okay. I promise."

It's true: you've got him back now, and nothing is going to take him away from you again.

At last, an ambulance pulls into the street, and a few familiar faces pop out, running toward you, shocked.

"Mackenzie!" Pence cries, kneeling down next to you and Roxas, who is still breathing, but barely.

"Please, don't worry about me," you insist. "Get him help!"

"You got it."

As you help Pence and the others put Roxas on a stretcher, you notice Roxas briefly open his eyes. He looks beyond dazed.

"Roxas," you mouth, and he looks at you, a confused expression on his face. Just as suddenly, his eyes close again. You bite your bottom lip. Even if he makes it...what comes next?

later on

still your pov

"Mackenzie, are you hungry?"

Lifting your head, you look up at Aerith. She looks concerned still.

"No," you reply, lowering your gaze back down to your hands, which are gripping Roxas' hand tightly. "Is he any better from when I last woke up?"

You've been in the hospital with Roxas for four days now. With the exception of going to the bathroom, you haven't left his side. It's the least you can do.

"Yes, he is." Aerith smiles. "Now I'm kind of starting to worry about _you_."

"I'll be fine," you insist, sitting up straighter. "This is nothing compared to busy days at work."

Speaking of, you officially love your boss-when you told him it was a "family emergency," he let you have a week of vacation for it. You'll have to go back to work in a few days, but you hope that by then, Roxas will be better.

"He hasn't woken up yet, has he?" you ask. Aerith sighs.

"Not yet. His body is under so much stress, though, so don't worry too much."

"Easy for you to say," you murmur, lowering your head again. _You're not the one who broke half of your ribs, or who broke your arm, or who cracked your skull, or who nearly snapped your neck. You can move still, so don't tell me not to worry about him_.

Roxas came so close to being paralyzed, and there's still a chance of relapse, but from what Aerith and Yuffie have said, he'll pull through.

"Mackenzie?"

Sitting up again, you turn to look at Olette, who is standing in the doorway, confused.

"What's up?" you ask.

"There's someone here to see you," she says. Your heart drops. "He says-"

"_He_?" Yuffie bursts into the room from next door. "It's your mysterious boyfriend! Make him come in, Olette!"

"Yuffie!" you cry, but Olette has already left. Now you're _really_ screwed.

"Well, you can't love them both," Yuffie points out, gesturing to Roxas. "If you're going to break up with him, this is the time."

"No, it's not," you insist, standing as you grow angrier and angrier. You're not angry at her, not entirely-moreso at yourself.

"Kenzie?"

You immediately go rigid at the sound of Riku's voice. Turning, you see him standing in the doorway, and you quickly turn to Yuffie and Aerith, who are stunned, completely speechless.

"..._Riku_?" they say in perfect unison.

Riku, thankfully, ignores them both and walks over to you.

"What happened?" he asks you, looking at Roxas. You pray he doesn't wake up.

"Riku..." You bite your bottom lip hard, searching for words.

"No, it's okay." He shakes his head. "You don't have to explain. I think I understand what happened."

"...Then tell me."

"You still love him. You really always have. Having me around was like having him back, wasn't it? Because...you could trust me. Am I right?"

"How did you know?" you ask. "_I_ didn't even realize it until this happened."

"When we went to Destiny Islands, you mentioned a memory of an event that never happened between us, and that was my first clue to the fact that you were using me to replace Roxas in your mind."

"...I really am sorry," you tell him, frowning.

"It's okay. You don't really know me all that well anyway. I don't exactly have the prettiest past, either."

"Hold on, stop."

You and Riku turn to look at Yuffie, who finally broke her silence. She looks furious and confused.

"Why are you even here, Riku?" she asks, her voice cracking because of the volume. Frowning, you let go of Roxas' hand and shut the door so your little encounter won't disturb anyone else. "I mean, I'm really happy to see you, don't get me wrong. But I don't understand what's going on here!"

"You've been dating Riku this whole time?" Aerith asks you, and you nod. "Why didn't you tell us?"

"Because...I..." You hesitate; you just can't break your promise to Roxas. No way.

"Mackenzie...they have to know," Riku murmurs.

"No. I won't break my promise," you insist, standing tall. Riku frowns. "I can't, I just can't."

"I...understand. You have something to lose by it." He looks away from you, and you feel a twinge of guilt. "But I don't."

"Riku, please," you plead with him. But you can tell by the look on his face that he's made up his mind.

"Aerith...Yuffie...do you really want to know why I'm here?" he begins. You wrap your arms around your body, shaking in fear. You're ready to throw yourself over Roxas just to protect him.

"Yes," they both say, unwavering.

"...The reason the way things are now is because of one thing, and it has to do with Roxas and Namine. This has gone unsaid for long enough." Riku glances at you, looking almost apologetic. "...Sora and Kairi are dead."

"What?" Yuffie shrieks.

"How?" Aerith says, obviously not buying.

"Because of that guy right there." Riku nods at Roxas. "And Namine. Didn't you wonder how they got their own freedom? It's because they killed Sora and Kairi to gain hearts."

"Are you trying to tell us that Roxas...Roxas _murdered_ Sora?" Yuffie hisses, her face going red.

"Yes. It's true. And it's the reason why we're all right here, right now. Mackenzie left because of it, I came here because of it, and Namine died because of it."

The room is silent, but you can feel the energy radiating at such a strong pace that it feels like you're swimming in it.

"...I'm going to kill him," Yuffie says, closing her eyes. "I'm going to KILL HIM!"

"NO!" you scream, nearly jumping across the bed to hold your friend back. Aerith does nothing; she just stands there with the most startled expression you've ever seen.

"Yuffie, don't hurt him!" you cry, struggling against her.

"I'll rip that heart right out of him!" she snarls, reaching past you to get to Roxas. Some sort of strength in you is pushing her back.

"Yuffie, don't!"

"I'll tear the life support right off of him!"

"_Yuffie_!"

"Yuffie, don't even think about it!"

At the sound of Riku's voice, you both freeze.

"If our worlds were to ever need a keyblade wielder again, he would be the one to take Sora's spot," Riku tells her, his voice low.

"But...he..."

"Yuffie, if Roxas were meant to be dead, I would've killed him a long time ago," he says angrily. "Don't you even _think_ about it."

"...Nnn..."

Everyone in the room stands completely still out of sheer fear. The little noise you just heard...

"Roxas...?" you say, turning to him.

He cringes, like your voice was too loud, then his eyes slowly open. The first person he sees is Riku, and you watch as his whole body tenses up.

"Roxas," you repeat, trying to get his attention.

"Why...?" He can't even get out a full sentence. "...Why...?"

"You owe me," Riku mutters to him, throwing open the door and walking out of the room.

"Roxas, is it true?" Aerith says, walking over to Roxas' side. "Please, don't lie. Are Sora and Kairi really...?" She can't say the word.

Frowning, Roxas looks away, then looks up at you, his whole face hardening.

"Roxas," you say quickly. "Please, I didn't-"

His icy glare silences you. You can't even bear to look at him anymore, you're so ashamed.

two weeks later

still your pov

You've been waiting about fifteen minutes in the waiting room, so now you know how all of those people you've seen give you weird looks feel. Everything feels pretty insignificant right now compared to what's going on inside your mind. Roxas is going home today, and you know this is probably the only chance you'll get to talk to him. You have to stay calm, no matter what.

Yuffie, Aerith, and the others have all found out Roxas' big secret. Thanks to Riku and his threat, no one has laid a hand on Roxas. Everyone has been grieving in their own way, but everyone is pretty much over it by now. After all, it had been a few years since they had seen Sora and Kairi in the first place, so the loss wasn't as great as it could've been.

After a few more minutes of deep thought, you stand up and start pacing a little. This is just too much. Why did everything have to be so complicated? This was never a future you imagined for yourself.

Finally, you turn around to see Roxas walking out from the hallway, followed by Aerith. He looks like he's still in pain, but much better than before. You'd laugh at the bright blue cast on his arm, but he'd probably hate you even more.

"..." He sees you after a moment, and you both freeze.

_This is it_, you tell yourself, walking toward him. _Stay calm_.

Once you reach him, you open your mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. You can barely look him in the eyes, which are outlined by dark circles, a result of physical pain and mental exhaustion. You're probably the main cause of it, too.

"..." To your surprise, Roxas starts to push past you.

"Wait!" you cry, grabbing his hand, making sure to avoid the broken arm. "Wait, please. Please, just listen to me!"

He is testing your calmness by not turning around, but at least he stops.

"...I'm sorry!" you wail, breaking down like a little kid. You fall to your knees, head hanging toward the ground. "I know you must hate me, but please know that I'm so sorry, and I would do anything to go back and fix everything I've done to hurt you this past year! I still love you, and I always have!" You choke on your sobs, shaking. "It's okay if you hate me, but please let me know you're listening now!"

You try to supress your sobs so you can hear his reply. For a while, he says nothing.

"...I want to hate you," he finally says, making you let out a rough cough/sob in reply. "All this time, you've been with Riku, and the second I saw you again, I wanted to hate you. And I still do. I really want to hate you. I..."

His voice trails off, and you can't tell what he's thinking, which scares you so much.

"I want to hate you. But...I...I can't. I can't hate you. You just did what anyone else would've done. I wish I could hate you, because I think it would make this easier. But...I don't ever do anything the easy way, do I...?"

You hold your breath, unable to believe he's really saying these things.

"I want to hate you, but I can't...because...I...still love you too much."

Yeah, so much for staying calm. Your entire body has just erupted into convulsions.

"I'm sorry," he says, pulling you up to your feet. He's the only thing keeping you from falling to the ground. "C'mon, can you stand up for, like, two seconds so I can at least hug you?"

roxas' pov

You're not quite sure what Kenzie is thinking right now, but she's pretty much an emotional mess right now. Come to think of it, you kind of are, too, but there's no way you'll let anyone see that.

"I love you," you tell her, but that only makes it worse. You can't help but laugh, even though it still hurts. "Hey, come on, it's okay."

She sobs into her hands, her bright red hair falling in her face. Smiling, you pull her close to you, wincing a little as she hugs you tightly. The pain is okay, though. You note Aerith's little smirk from off in the distance, and you wink at her. She laughs quietly and walks away.

"Please...forgive me..." Kenzie says at last, looking up at you.

"Been there, done that," you reply, shrugging. "Now let's hear the same from you."

She laughs a little, then nods. Pressing her lips into yours, Kenzie wraps her arms around your sore neck. You can feel her slowly losing her balance as she leans closer to you. It's okay...now you have the strength to catch her.


	17. Epilogue, Mark II:  Kimi Nanda

Epilogue, Mark II: Kimi Nanda (youtube = watch?v=v9ZlZFwF3hc)

Memo: In return for the long ending, this epilogue is shorter! XD Enjoy, and thank you so much for reading this. It's been a wonderful journey. :3 With love and until next time, Emi Hikari. ((See you all soon with the next!))

six months later

your pov

"So, tell me you guys are free Friday night?" Yuffie asks you and Roxas. Amused, you glance at him for his reaction.

"If we can find a babysitter, maybe," he replies, laughing.

"Geez, you guys! You act like she's actually _yours_."

"She technically _is_," you point out. Still smiling, you plant a kiss right on top of Carly's head.

"Does this mean you guys are going to adopt all of the kids in this hospital now?" Aerith teases you. You only grin back.

Yeah, it was a little expensive, and it's definitely time-consuming, but adopting Carly was probably one of the best decisions both you and Roxas have ever made. ...That's really saying something, considering you both have done some pretty stupid things in the past.

But what's past is past, and now you can-finally-look forward, toward the future.

"What it means is that they're never going to be able to have fun on Friday nights ever again," Yuffie answers for you. "By the time Carly is old enough to stay home alone, they'll probably have kids of their own."

Blushing, you make a face at Yuffie, who sticks her tongue out at you in response.

"Can you really resist this face?" Roxas asks, gesturing to Carly's cute little smile.

"Just like you can't resist _this_," Yuffie retorts, pointing at you. She and Aerith crack up, and-like always-people stop and stare.

"...I'm going to leave now," you say, pouting. "See you later, Roxas."

"See you," he says, kissing you on the cheek and giving you a big smile. You can't help but smile back. He used to smile with sad eyes, but now, everything's different.

Of course, everything is also _better_, too. After everything you went through, you're finally where you want to be. Took you long enough, but yeah, it's true.

"You can always call Riku!" Yuffie calls after you. "He's still in town!"

Ah, yeah, Riku. You wouldn't call him a family friend, but once in a while you still talk. He's a nice guy, but lost. He won't ever be going back to the islands, he says, and you can't help but feel a little bit guilty...

As you leave the hospital, you think of the very first time you ever met Roxas, and how chaotic everything was then, and you can't help but wonder if everything will stay that chaotic.

"Kenzie!"

You turn around to see Roxas running toward you.

"Yeah? What's wrong?" you ask him as he slows down.

He doesn't answer with words; instead he plants a big kiss right on your lips.

"...I feel better now," he says, smiling. "Okay, bye."

He runs back inside, leaving you standing there like an idiot.

_Yeah, okay, expect chaos_, you tell yourself. _But I'll have a hand to hold the whole way through_.

END


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